Monday, August 21, 2017

Total Eclipse of the Sun #pezoutlaw #hollywood

It Plagues The Mind

I've been dealing with death lately.
Pinky Dog died n Aunt Lou dog hasn't much time left..
The Old Man, horse died.
A childhood friend from my teens, human died.


At this point I'll end what I share with facebook, they just don't want to hear the rest of this n I respect there feelings about it.

From the perspective of the dead this reality ended.
I think about that a lot.
What difference does it make to you if life goes on after you're life ends.
With each death the world ends.

People behave very poorly toward one another considering this.
That argument, bomb, knife, dollar or lust mean nothing to you seconds after you are dead,
All these things that mean so much in life mean nothing in death.
At best we spend a century here n then eternity there.

This is not a new thought for me, I've been trying to come to grips with it since I was 5yrs old.
Best I can tell from this side of the veil is that there is no answer.
I've found only one truth in 66yrs.
We are here in life so we are meant to play it out, nothing else is obvious.

The rules for life are set by we believe the agreement of those of us participating in this reality.
I've rebelled against this agreed upon structure my whole life.
The truth is I behave n play somewhat by these rules because if you don't the rules/people will hurt you.
Believing all the time though that these rules are BS.

I've walked a razors edge my whole life of my truth n the worlds truth.
The results are I'm considered crazy, because I do not buy or agree with the commonly held consensus of truth.
I'm not sure what I believe in but I know that this is not it.
This reality is just the agreed upon pacifier while we wait for what we fear.

Yes I play mostly by the rules as set forth.
I even figured out how to win within this fabricated structure for a while.
In the end I was found out and crushed for my insolence.
You must be a true believer or you are rejected for not conforming.

I've become a court jester to hide my true self.
I've no interest in your cause because it's just a foolish pursuit to make you feel good while you hide from the truth.
I've no interest in harming anyone or anything in any way because it's just bad Karma.
With my time left I wait in the hope that a real truth might be reveal itself, giggling at the chaos of avoidance.

Let me reveal one truth while some run around like Chicken Little.
The Sun will go out eventually n Earth will not fare well because of it.
That's a hard truth Chicken Little does not utter.
Meaning that the only pursuit humanity could have that means anything would be the colonization of other planets.

We walk around in life Zombies to the truth behind the veil.
Slaves to a fabrication of what's important, born out of fear.
Don't ask the real questions n don't think about the real truth.
That direction is madness, obsessing about foolish things with solutions, though meaningless is far easier.

Like I said, I just don't give a damn about much anymore. 

Chalk this post up to the overwhelming influence of the Moon Today.

With the Big Hoo Ha today about the Eclipse, makes me wonder what cavemen thought when they happened.
Been hearing I should put n keep animals in during the Eclipse.
Truth is it's not an issue, you know cause animals aren't stupid, they just don't look at the sun.

After Pez Outlaw, I intend to retire.
new profile pic captures my essence





Pez Outlaw Diary






Wednesday, August 16, 2017

My B Movie Life #pezoutlaw #hollywood

eh
exclamation: eh
  1. used to represent a sound made in speech in a variety of situations, in particular to ask for something to be repeated or explained or to elicit agreement.

    "“Eh? What's this?”"
from google

From Pez Outlaw- eh meaning who cares.

I just don't give a damn about much of anything anymore.
The clock is ticking louder n louder with each passing day.
All this BS we fight about means nothing when time runs out.
I just don't understand why more people don't realize it.

At the end we are left with reflection of a life lived.
Were my efforts worth the life I was given?
I've led a bizarre life, was that the intention?
Honestly, people make no sense to me at all.

If life is just an illusion why don't we write it better?
I wrote my own code for a decade.
I just wish I could remember how I did it.

Old Sparkie goes out eventually.
Then What?
Am I just a madman screaming in the wilderness?

I woke up this morning sick of hearing myself talk.
The troubling thing was I hadn't said anything yet.
The problem is, if I stop talking I'd have to face my fears.
Let's not do that, OK.

Now we join our regularly schedule program, already in progress.
************************
amusements while we wait.

1st Amazon now Apple spending 1 Billion ea on content, Just Saying.

Are movies made for airing on Amazon, Netflix n Apple actually B Movies of yesteryear?
Was the Pez Outlaw story always a really good B movie?
Questions I couldn't possibly have an answer to.

Would a Pez Outlaw movie on 1 of the subscription base download platforms be good enough?
Also above my pay grade.

Would I think less of my life if all of the above were true? NO!
A lot of really great people made good livings making n appearing in good B movies.
Roy Rogers, Gene Autry n Gabby Hayes just to name a few.
I don't think that there lives or the value of there work was diminished in the slightest because the movies they made were not A's.

Pez Outlaw is the story of a blue collar guy taking a shot at the American Dream, so why not show it in the blue collar medium of a B Movie.
Your potential market is every person who buys a lottery ticket in hopes of getting there shot at happiness.
Truth is, if B movies were good enough for The Marx Brothers n the 3 Stooges then there good enough for Pez Outlaw.
I would be honored if my adventures as Pez Outlaw were depicted in a good B movie.

Pause While you read a whole buncha more words here that make a very convincing argument.
Proof beyond doubt.....................
As you can see from these statistics........................
Also a recent poll said.......................
Ok I win n it's done, what a relief.

I just want the Pez Outlaw story told n I'm not fussy how or where.
N yes I still want the book w/Jeff Maysh.

As the people who played a role in your life begin to die, your life slowly starts to disappear.
Goodbye Tom, Thanks for Sgt Pepper n so much more.
Most of all Tom, thank you for bringing Kathy n me together, over 45yrs later n she saves my life still every day.
Your life had meaning Tom for those you touched with it. 

I wake every morning now hearing Willie Nelson singing
“I woke up still not dead again today…”
.
An interesting revelation.
I've got just under 8,000 followers on twitter.
  recently followed me.
I thought, well I'll plug them n see if it boosts there followers.
Well not so much.
Realization, most of my followers on twitter are from Notes From The Asylum not Pez Outlaw Diary.
This Qualifier, Not the Pez, Pez Outlaw but yes the Pez Outlaw now in n writing from the Asylum.
Funny how you end up somewhere completely different from where you started or even intended.
This is further emphasized by the fact that 1/2 to double per day views of Notes From The Asylum are from Czechia. 

I wanna tell you a BIG SECRET, so please don't tell anybody what I'm about to tell you.
Notes From The Asylum passed Pez Outlaw Diary in total views a good bit ago n by a wide margin, in 1/3 the time.
This was never my intention, NFTA was only supposed to be a pacifier while I waited on Hollywood.
What this tells me is that there is more interest in the broader view of Pez Outlaw than just the 1990s.
But our secret, OK?



Are you having a bad day, month, year or am I really that horrible of a person?

After Pez Outlaw, I intend to retire.
new profile pic captures my essence





Pez Outlaw Diary




Monday, August 14, 2017

Rocks Float #pezoutlaw #hollywood @pezoutlaw #NFTA

What an interesting n odd way to look at something.
My guess is you clicked this post hunting for an enlightening metaphor. 
Of course there is one but not today, today it's about the other things that give me joy.

Yes rocks float, to clarify in dirt.
Have you ever noticed how rocks seem to work there way up to the surface.
There's a point to this. 

Over the last week I've been working on a kinda big project.
Moving a barn n creating a circle drive.
Barn was in a bog n smack in the middle of where I wanted to put the circle drive.

I'd put a large amount of rocks at the entrances to the barn.
Well if I'd left them there they'd have just work up n killed the mower.
So I dug them all out n used them as a base for the drive.

The project is going well, but it would go better if I had any money.
What I wouldn't give for 5 six inch 8ft fence posts, 6 of 12ft 4x4s n 6 sheets of 3/4 OSB.
Make do n increase the labor quotient.

Temp is about 80 now n the work has been brutal.
Chores, manure removal, getting hay, then the projects.
4 hrs to mow, then weed whacking, plus the gardens.

Yesterday was stump removal day, got 5 of them out, 3 to go.
Did I mention that I do this shit alone.
Well me the tractor n Billy Dog.

This morning I got up n to my surprise I felt pretty good.
Felt like crapp for about a week.
Just plain wore out.

When I was a child I played football in 9th n 10th grade.
Workouts began in August.
We're talking exercise till you puke workouts.

This spring has been that same kind of rough.
10 days ago I thought I was getting back in shape after winter.
Silly Rabbit.

The last week has been a whole new level of tired.
You push up to the line n hydrate.
Collapse n do it again the next day n the next day.

I know where the line is.
Muscles start cramping from fatigue.
You needed to stop half hr ago. 

Hydrate, Hydrate, Hydrate.
I drink 48 oz of water in summer each day while I work.
I also drink 16 oz of Electric Lights liquid. 

Electric lights is intentional so no comments.
I'll live in my world, you live in yours.
My ways more fun.

Then you wake up one morning n you don't feel to bad.
Actually feel kinda good.
I like work, it keeps the mind busy.

Anyway, Rocks Float.

I just realized something.
I'm not invested in any particular post.
Me, just talking. 
I'm perfectly happy to let readers decide what they like.

here's what you think.




After Pez Outlaw, I intend to retire.
new profile pic captures my essence





Pez Outlaw Diary





















































Sunday, August 13, 2017

Big Fish Mystery #pezoutlaw #hollywood #NFTA

1st Amazon now Apple spending 1 Billion ea on content, Just Saying.

I used to think that all sorts of things really mattered n were worth getting upset about.
Not so much anymore.
You wonder, but you don't want to bother folks.




Case File 19. 


13 years ago I was in Paris.
No idea what the future held.
Do I really want to know?

Shadows fall.
How do I fit my dreams into this reality?
The Absurdity of life is intoxicating.

Don't tell people what you know is true.
Wear the face people expect to see. 
Mustn't appear different.

I keep going back to 51% Sane.
Are you ready for what's coming?
Maybe I wasn't

Bones in the crawl space? 
If not for crazy, reality would kill me. 
The shame of Time lost.

The cycle repeats.
My Angel is gone. 
Maybe Today.

Nothing is fixed.
Neglected past, unrecognized present.
Fantasy the last refuge.

The tears of a child for his future.
A window from that moment to this?
Is it yet to come?

I can't control how others see me.
That's their truth.
Crazy would be to try.


I came here expecting nothing.
Truth revealed itself.
Shame fell away.

A liberating truth.
Labels became assets.
Clarity, before darkness claims it's own.

Champion, Rocks Float , 7,100 views.
4 posts in Notes From The Asylum have well over 4,000 views each.

NFTA currently is at 500,000 views overall. 
My twitter page has had approx 5million impressions.


*******************************

"Do Not Go Gentle Into That Good Night" by Dylan Thomas


I like to think of life like the the stars in the sky.
Each star is a moment in time or a thought.
With NFTA I try to pluck some of those moments to create a stream of thought.

I understand that abstract thought is not every-bodies cup of tea.
Those that don't get or like it, don't.
Those that do, I treasure.

Life is just the agreed upon version of crazy.
My search is connect the unconnected dot that we usually can't see.
Big Fish was a gift, that I'm very grateful for.

The title always comes first.
The words fall down underneath it.
The Universe in all its forms will speak to you if you are listening.

I have no use for the past n little for the present.
My interest is the moments in between.
Moments of clarity, a brief conversation with the unseen.

Reality is tedious, but moments of clarity are delicious.
I live each day in the hope of those brief moments.
I don't get them every day or even once a week, but often enough that I wait for each one.

That's why I'm so grateful for Big Fish.
The title is the key that unlocks the door.
Within is that which feeds my soul. 

Abstract thought is like dancing between raindrops n not getting wet.
The raindrops of the past, the present n the future.
What I want can only be found between the drops of rain.


*******************************

I really like Big Fish Mystery.
In my attempts to create abstraction with words, to date it's my best.
I really hope that you agree. 

Big Fish is now at over 5,000 views n at the top of my A-List. 
When you love something it feels really good to see approval. 

? some perspective might shed light.
I have cut approx 300 of the 520 posts I've written.
It used to be I cut a post if it only achieved 250 views in say 4 months.
Now posts with 500+ views get cut, I only want the best on Notes From The Asylum.
Very soon that bar will be any post with less than 1,000 views will get cut from NFTA.
Number of views are like ratings here at the Asylum, just like TV low ratings get cut.

Notes From The Asylum is just under 2yrs old.
It used to take 6months to a year for a post to hit 1,000 views.
Only 2 other posts have had this type of success out of the 500 posts I've written n the 194 that have survived on NFTA.
That said though over a dozen posts are now at over 2,000 views ea.
1 post is at over 4,000 views, 2020 ☑️ PEZ OUTLAW FOR PRESIDENT #pezoutlaw #holly...

Of all the things I've done in my life, I would find the most gratification in Notes From The Asylum being published. 
NFTA is creation n I love that most of all.

Within the next 2 months Notes From The Asylum will reach a very big milestone.
Unfortunately, to broadcast it might not be something I should share.

*****************************

To my knowledge Congress nor the President are going to pass a law giving Pez Outlaw success.

So Forgive me, I just feel if my life is gonna change, I gotta do it.
Various administrations come n they go, my destiny is up to me.
So Holidays etc, I continue to work. 

Other peoples good fortune is there's not mine.
I choose not to live through there success or failure.
To do so would diffuse my efforts. 

Congratulations n good luck but honestly it will not change my life.
Only my efforts can be mine or change my life.
That said we continue, I have daily goals that must be met. 

***************************************************


Today my mood like my Boots has a lot of mud on it.
Have you ever noticed how your mood reflects the weather?

Yesterday one of the gals had a really good day with her horse.
She was walking around on cloud 9 n didn't want the day to end.

It's all perspective isn't it.
I've been slogging around in 4 inches of mud for 4 days now, so my perspective is different.

It's all where you stand.
Nice hard ground n enclosed arena or out in the pens like me n the horses.

Of all the posts I've written in Notes From The Asylum, Big Fish n Secrets are my favorites. 

Totally off subject.
Recently I was made aware of a Blue Dog needing a home.
I just couldn't, I need a Big Red Dog.
Like Maggie Thatcher said, I'm getting Wobbly.
Big Red Dogs (Bull Mastiff's) are my Spirit Guides. 
Yes, I believe in that stuff with all my heart.
It's been to long.

Just dawned on me, maybe that's her name.
Maggie. 

When you ask to be friended or follow me, make sure it's what you really want, because I'm relentless in pursuit of my goals.


After Pez Outlaw, I intend to retire.
new profile pic captures my essence





Pez Outlaw Diary


Saturday, August 12, 2017

2020 ☑️ PEZ OUTLAW FOR PRESIDENT #pezoutlaw #hollywood #NFTA

YES, I'M RUNNING FOR PRESIDENT!
2020 Campaign Slogan.
If it's good enough for Urkel, it's good enough for me. 
















Old men start slow. 
It takes 4 years to get our momentum going.
In 2016 I ran a 4 week campaign, for 2020 I figured I'd run a 4 year campaign.
Failure is no excuse for not trying again. 

To those who chant the mantra against "The Permanent Campaign". 
Yo Mama.

I intend to spend the same amount of money in my 2020 run for President as I did in my 2016 run. ZERO! 
I figure if I can get the CRAZY vote  that I'm a shoe in for President in 2020.
What? I waited 4 weeks to announce.




I view life as performance art.
Pez Outlaw For President.





Wouldn't it be cool if there was a Pez Outlaw For President pin like this of above pic.



I'm crowd funding votes for Pez Outlaw for president



I'm attempting to crowd fund your write in vote for Pez Outlaw for president as publicity to get a book published.





It's for the children

PEZ OUTLAW FOR PRESIDENT
It's for the children, puppies n kittens.








WRITE IN VOTE, PEZ OUTLAW FOR PRESIDENT in 2020
I'm a Strong believer in nepotism, I Will fill as many positions as possible with family members.
  

the caliber of my appointees..



If elected President I only think it's fair to give you an idea of the caliber of my appointees..
 








Thank You, Thank You Very Much


WRITE IN VOTE, PEZ OUTLAW FOR PRESIDENT on Nov. 8, 2020
Campaign song, Hay, Hay, Poo, Poo............


Every Dead person that can should get out n Vote Pez Outlaw for President





WRITE IN VOTE, PEZ OUTLAW FOR PRESIDENT

Presidential Qualifications
I shovel Horse Shit for a living.



Every Presidential election year a lot of Americans decide to not vote for any of the candidates for President on the ballot. These voters instead choose to write in a name of there own for President as a gesture of defiance concerning what is on offer. These write in votes are a right in our election process but unfortunately count very little in the end. My hope is that if you are going to write in a candidate for President that you make your protest in the name Pez Outlaw. If I can get enough people who write in a candidate for president to write in Pez Outlaw a secondary good will come from your act of protest. Your vote might also have the secondary effect of getting me a book deal. 

Your write in vote will gain you nothing, so why not let it do some good for somebody else. ME! To address a concern you might have as to how good a writer I actually am. For this book I'm trying to get published with the help of you writing in Pez Outlaw for President. I'm already under contract with the ghost writer Jeff Maysh who wrote the April 2015 Playboy story The Pez Outlaw see-  http://www.playboy.com/articles/pez-outlaw   which won 2 writing awards. see- Pez Outlaw Wins 2 Awards #pezoutlaw #hollywood    

So I'm asking you to Vote Pez Outlaw as a write in for President. You know that you are going to do it anyway, all I'm asking is that you let that act of protest have a secondary good by making your write in vote for president be Pez Outlaw.

I love this straight jacket pic.



Because there are so many voices/personalities in my head, my campaign is fully staffed.
Pez Outlaw for President.   









I plan to campaign sorta hard when I have time


I plan to campaign sorta hard when I have time #pezoutlaw #hollywood: VOTE, PEZ OUTLAW FOR PRESIDENT on Nov. 8, 2020



I want to recycle your write in protest vote for president into something new, a Pez Outlaw Book. Vote Pez Outlaw for President.



My philosophy on life is this. You never give up, never give in n never quit trying. Try everything no matter how foolish others might think you are for attempting it. That you do is what separates you from those who only wish for things. I have now spent almost 2 decades on this 1 project, that's the dedication to a dreams fulfillment that it takes.




I have zero money, but even that to me is no excuse. As always the trick is to find the loophole n exploit it. I have my story so for me this time that loophole is the great equalizer of the internet. With the internet I can without money pursue my dream of a Pez Outlaw book. If you write in Pez Outlaw for president this year, my dream of a book could come true.

At first glance I accept how crazy this idea seems, but if people who write in a vote for president choose Pez Outlaw, it will work.
That old thing, it's so crazy, it might just work.
VOTE, PEZ OUTLAW FOR PRESIDENT

Pez Outlaw For President, Recent campaign rally.

Donald trump might get 10,000 to 15,000 people at a rally, but look how many people we got in a phone booth.

Yes we held a campaign rally in a phone booth, it was the only place we could get, but we packed em in. 




Cabinet Meeting of my administration

I promise as President to do absolutely nothing except take pointless trips on Airforce 1 n play Golf.



From the big brain room






VOTE, PEZ OUTLAW FOR PRESIDENT has 3,200 views so far.  
Pretty good for one of my posts. 
My #1 post is VOTE, PEZ OUTLAW FOR PRESIDENT on Nov. 8 #pezoutlaw.
In my reality, only my numbers are relevant.





It's official.
VOTE, PEZ OUTLAW FOR PRESIDENT on Nov. 8 is now the highest viewed post on Notes From The Asylum.
Yes, I Hammered it to get there.


I'm shamelessly seeking validation n approval, hence the following.

Google+ Followers, please give VOTE, PEZ OUTLAW FOR PRESIDENT post a G+1 positive feedback.


Within insanity, find good
Out of chaos, find purpose
Solutions are found in the most unlikely of places
To find answers, you must have eyes that can see
Faith n belief in yourself, will carry you  

This crazy pretend world I've created is where I find refuge from the harsh n painful realities of life. My dreams are what sustain me. All my crazy schemes give me hope.

Now, On With The Show

I'm campaigning for the Mickey Mouse, Evan McMullin, Gary Johnson n Jill Stein Vote. 

VOTE, PEZ OUTLAW FOR PRESIDENT on Nov. 8
Why Not, could I possibly be worse?


America has a long n proud history of crazy people running for President.
My turn.

"As President, I Pez Outlaw couldn't possibly do worse."
Pez Outlaw for President yard sign.
Pez Outlaw for President, Better than Mickey Mouse. 

It's a race to the bottom for President, Vote Pez Outlaw for President because I'm it.
So if you're looking for the bottom of the barrel for President, look no further, Pez Outlaw. 
In a year of bad choices for President, Why not make the worst choice, Pez Outlaw.


Are you better off than you were 8yrs ago?
Things could be worse, Vote Pez Outlaw for President. 

A Vote for Pez Outlaw is a vote for ummmmmm yup change.

If elected I promise a 1957 Ford Truck in every garage.
You'll thank me later, after the pulse.

Pez Outlaw for President Campaign slogan.
My best friend has a favorite stick.
Though her favorite stick changes every few days, they wear out.

I  know a lot of folks are terribly conflicted this year n are gonna write in a crazy name in protest.
I'm here to ask for that vote.
Write in any other name is just a shameful waste. 
Make your write in vote PEZ OUTLAW for president because I might get a book deal out of it.
From my perspective that vote then would not have been wasted. 

Think of your write in vote of PEZ OUTLAW for president as crowd funding a book deal for me.

Every Presidential election year a significant number of people vote for Mickey Mouse.
I'm asking for the Mickey Mouse vote.
Let's make it Pez Outlaw this time.

I know a lot of people are ashamed to say who they are voting for right now.
Say PEZ OUTLAW for President with pride. 

If mistakenly elected President, I promise to only serve 90 days, just long enough to get a great retirement package.

As President I promise that all my speeches will be pointless rambling about nothing n made up stuff.
As president many of my speeches would simply be "Dude" then, he gone.

As President I would rent out every room in the White House like a bed n breakfast to raise money to pay down the National debt. 

As President I would turn the White House front lawn into a horse pasture for the Old Man n his Buds. 


As President all motorcades would include me on my tractor moving at a snails pace. 

As President besides doing nothing, I promise to also stand for nothing. 

I promise as President it would be like I wasn't even there. 


But Wait There's More, Act now n..........


Here's the book Pez Outlaw Diary 
It's FREE online to read, right now.




After Pez Outlaw, I intend to retire.
new profile pic captures my essence





Pez Outlaw Diary

Friday, August 11, 2017

Secrets #pezoutlaw #hollywood #NFTA

Pez Outlaw
My grandson wants my life n I want my dog Proby's life.

Why are people determined to draw you into the things they find interesting?
I refuse to waste my time on all the useless endeavors of others.
Computer n Cell Phone obsession is the worst, what a bunch of drivel.
Please attend this or join me at that.
NO! 
Then the guilting, but it would make me happy if you did.
Does it count for nothing that it would make me miserable n potentially suicidal? 
People need to hear the word NO more.
You say NO nowadays n people react like you killed a puppy.

Revealing truth is liberating.
Withholding truth makes you vulnerable.
Secrets are a cancer on your soul.
Yet life is filled with secrets.

You can't live without relationships.
Though the maintenance is set with Booby-traps.
One wrong step n that spiky thing comes at you.
When did it get so complicated.

You'd think honesty would protect you.
Some days I get wore out from careful conversation. 
The truth is, you can't be honest with people.
Total honesty repels people. 

I just apologized to a friend for saying what's on my mind.
I wish it was the first time.
I told him that I seem to have a talent for making people not want to talk to me.
Just an observation, how much it matters I'm uncertain of.

So you hold your thoughts close.
Until that one person who gets you, Joshua my son says something.
N you almost scream in response, Yeah!
The response is almost a cry of relief.

Then Joshua says something else n again halfway though you shout, YEAH!
Thinking all the while, Why don't others seem to see it.
Then Josh says people are telling him he's becoming more like me by the day.
It was inevitable, I am my father, Joshua is me n Danny or Jake will be Joshua.

So what's the point?
There is none, just frustration.
People say they want the truth or an honest answer, but they really don't.
They want to hear whatever version makes them feel OK with themselves.

Problem is that I usually know what I want and what I think.
Where I get in trouble is when I share it.
Are there rules I don't know how to follow?
Is this written down somewhere?

I've met people who look scared at the thought of saying what they want.
N if you press them, it angers them, like I'm somehow not respecting the process.
I see this over n over and I still don't understand it.
I am willing to accept what I want, To some what they want is a process.

People say I get there to quick, n that I'm impatient.
The thing is that I know what I want n time is slipping away.
With Pez, What made me different?
Really simple. I saw something n I acted on it, while others thought about acting. 

I'm as puzzled today at almost 65 as I was a child of 5. 
I'm not delusional, I don't think that this is brilliant. 
I'm just purging. 
My imaginary shrink says I need to write things down.

It's like I told Josh, write it out straight, then make it abstract.
Because if you say it straight it offends people.
Keep it vague n people can interpret the meaning to there liking.
Truth can be liberating but it can also be cruel or unwanted.

That n I believe I push to hard.
For which I'm truly sorry.
But we know I won't change.
It's like the scorpion n the river, It's my nature.

I will say this though.
I may know what I think from given information.
Though I have no idea what that information will be.
Meaning, I have no idea what the future holds.

I know what I want but it's in the hands of those pesky relationships.
N Yup you guessed it, they don't want to talk to me.
A Feller could get a complex, were it not for ego. 
I'm OK, You're OK. Are we good?

I remain. 
Not a Damn clue. 
Yours.
Pez Outlaw.

Thank God, it's time for therapy.
Smiley Face, today we get Jello or is it Pudding?
See what I mean?

My imaginary Shrink says, It only matters if you pretend to know if it's pudding or Jello. 

The Title should have been Jello or Pudding. 
Should I change it?
I like my life, I do things the way I like.
Example is the 4 line verse I use here, just because I like it.

We went on a deep dive today.
Hopefully it was amusing. 

Of all the posts I've written in Notes From The Asylum, Big Fish n Secrets are my favorites.
 
After Pez Outlaw, I intend to retire.
new profile pic captures my essence





Pez Outlaw Diary


Thursday, August 10, 2017

Him n Me - Pez Today #pezoutlaw #hollywood #NFTA


Saddle Up n Put on Your Rain Poncho's boys n girls.
I'll show you how it should be.
You only think you've seen crazy?
The best is yet to come.

Pez Today Lacks Vision
It needs a Wham Bam Thank You Mam Crazy Person to add some creative mythology.
In short, more story, more depth n more of a creative input, more performance art as narration.

I say this for many reasons.
Starting with, 
How long can Pez Corporation live off my old ideas, "crystals, glow in the dark n color variations".
How much money would I have if I'd received just 1 penny for every Bubble man, Crystal, glow in the dark or color variation dispenser Pez corp has sold since 1998.
My guess, well over $100,000.00.

The above is my resumes for the job of kick starting another revival of Pez like I did before.
Pez Outlaw, Can you still bring the crazy that's needed?
Does a bear poo in the woods?
Sheldon that means YES! 

This time though you'd get more of a Howard Hughes Pez Outlaw than the sj glew Pez Outlaw of old.
Would that be a good thing?
Yes, a mysterious reclusive Pez Outlaw adds Myth, much written by necessity of the absence of data.
Also, if The New Pez Outlaw is a recluse, doesn't that make the few sightings of him more of an event worthy of attending.

Yes I write about Pez Outlaw in the 3rd person.
2 reasons.
1. I view Pez Outlaw as a character that embodies that part of my life.
2. If I can separate myself from him n I can (diagnosed schizophrenic in 1969) then I can as an outsider manage n promote him/Pez Outlaw.

To tell you the truth, Pez Outlaw n I are 2 very different people that bleed over into each other.
Me, I'm a recluse, not an extrovert characteristic in my body.
Pez Outlaw is larger than life itself n I really like him.
I can pour all the things I wouldn't n couldn't do into him.
Pez Outlaw is like a surrogate (Bruce Willis movie) I can step into to enter your world.

This though does create quite a few schisms between Pez Outlaw n myself.
Pez Outlaw believes all things I write about are possible n likely.
Me, not so much because I'm the skeptic.
Pez Outlaw thinks there will be a movie or that Pez Corp would of course make the Pez Outlaw collection.
On the other hand I myself believe both have a snowballs chance in hell.
Truth is that I let him run with those fantasies because it makes him happy n what harm is there in letting him believe.
Kinda like, Why would you tell a 5yr old that there's no Santa Claus.
It makes him happy.

I'm not sure that I should've revealed those truths, might adversely affect dk, jeff n Pez Corp.
Is it a good idea to let dk, jeff n pez corp know that you view them as a waste of time that you indulge to pacify one of the personalities in your head.
At that I'm leaving out Biff Rose n Thorn-apple Trees.
Screw it, you deserve the truth, just this once.
So you've got perspective for the future. 

This one addendum to the above.
I may not believe in those mentioned but I do believe in Pez Outlaw.
I'm not the problem as repeatedly told (yeah that really stuck in my craw), 
I'm the solution.
Ammmmmm..... I mean He Is. Pez Outlaw, you know not me?


I didn't say all that, He Did.
the guy in the pic. so blame him not me.
************

On the collector side it also lacks vision.
I  recently offered 2,500 banks at .75cents per.
Cheap right! But it seems the ability to see how you could sell or use that many is gone.
I used to buy up to 10,000 per type of a dispenser knowing I could sell them all.
The vision is so much smaller now.


Fantasy Pez
They scare the hell out of me as to the future of Pez Collecting.
Best example a guy showing a Kooky Zoo Elephant clear blueish he created talking about his discovery of pressure method or something.
When the line between real n fantasy blurs this much, it is not a good thing.

Known Universe is becoming to large to wrap your mind around.
Say 1,000 known dispensers in approx 1994.
Today triple that n Pez Corp is going crazy creating everything they can license or imagine.
There needs to be a new demarcation point, similar to no feet to footed.
This is way over due.

Travel.
This morning I'm listening to Serious XM The Highway n the dj is talking about a singer traveling in Europe.
For the first time in a decade n a half I thought, Yeah I could do that again.
You have to wonder how Pez Corp would feel about a resurgence of Pez Outlaw in there lives.

With all I've written, here's something still untold.
I've never written or told anyone who my real contacts were.
I've protected these sources for over 2 decades n never will reveal them.
Yes I've mentioned some, but only the unimportant ones.
No matter how rough things have gotten, even when offered money, I've declined.
You can't buy or sell relationships.

Pez Outlaw Diary Book publishing rights 4sale by owner 75k


My impression from ebay is that Pez is in a slump.
David has MMM's I sold 20yrs ago for $25 to $35 at $26.00.
Generally I just don't see enthusiasm.

Makes me think Pez needs a good kick in the pants.
Would a big Pez Outlaw thingy be just the medicine?
A nationwide whamp of excitement n spotlight.

By now you all know me better from my writing in Notes From The Asylum.
I really don't like the spotlight, I prefer my quiet life.
If this thing happens I will make it about Pez Outlaw n Pez not me.

My hope is that all of you will use this opportunity for yourselves n the hobby of collecting Pez.
I have absolutely no problem with stepping back n letting you all have some fun with it.
Like Chancy Gardener said, "I like to watch".

Once this happens I believe it would be better served by a thousand points of light than one.
I won't need to tell you when to begin, it will be obvious.
Step forward n use it with my blessing, the more you do, the less I will have to. 

Lately I've become a fan of the pre2016 British Top Gear, because those guys were seriously nuts. (I don't care who hit who, FUNNY IS FUNNY! quit being so PC n fix it. comedy is supposed to be irreverent n anarchistic.) more (I'm not saying Matt Lablanc n that other guys 2016 show is awful, It's just not the Top Gear I like with Captain Slow, The Hamster n the Big Ape.)
The point is the crazy stuff Jeremy says in his intros to The Stig.
Make up all kinds of outlandish stories n recollections of Pez Outlaw.

The crazier the better.
Who am I to say it's not true. 
Pez Outlaw needs to become as much myth as Legend.
1st known photo of Pez Outlaw - 1957

Examples:
Pez Outlaw once walked the entire length of the Great Wall of China backwards because he thought he was being followed.
Pez Outlaw was offered the Presidency of Pez Corporation but couldn't afford the pay cut. 
Certain facts in the History of Pez Outlaw are true, but that doesn't mean everything needs to be.

Pez Outlaw came to being because of Pez n the Hobby of Collecting Pez.
In that sense Pez Outlaw n his story belongs to you also.
So have fun with it, "It's always better to ask forgiveness than Permission".

I mentioned how major dealers are selling pez at or below what I sold for 20 yrs ago.
To illustrate.

Pez I bought under questionable providence, I paid $1.25 each. 
Add to that the following costs;
Ticket to Europe n back approx $800 to $900.00
Car approx $500. to $800.00
Hotel $300 to $500.00
Extra luggage fee approx $300.00
Food etc $300.00

Point being any pez I brought into the USA from Europe had a base cost of approx $2.00 ea.
I'm just saying that I do not understand the low prices I'm seeing on ebay.

If? IF!
We'll see what we can do about that.
One last ride by Pez Outlaw.

If it happens Saddle Up n Put on Your Rain Poncho's boys n girls.
I'll show you how it should be.

Ask the folks who were at the conventions we attended.
They'll tell you what good times look like. 

True or False

Josh n I once ran around a Pez Convention in Gorilla Costumes. True.

I once turned over half a refrigerator box of Pez in the middle of the floor of a Pez Convention as a free mad scramble give away. True. actually twice, Cleveland n LA.

Pez Outlaw once drove his rental car through a mall area in downtown Vienna. True.

Pez Outlaw was held at gun point by Police/Military. True, this happened at least 2 to 3 times.

Anyway that's it for today.
Time to go be EB, putting final touches on tin horse shed today.
Yippie it's done, now on to the circle drive.

I thought this post was fun, hope you did to. 
1200 views in 48hrs. thank you so much for your support. 

Psycho Lucy

Psycho Lucy is probably one of the most underrated Pez dispensers ever made in a very short run. approx 300 were made, current value is $100 to $150.00

Psycho Lucy, one of Pez Outlaw's children.
Psycho Lucy was the first in a long line of Pez Outlaw Pez dispensers. Thank god this one was not duplicated by Pez USA.

Psycho Lucy is one of my fondest memories.  Black Santa n Psycho Lucy were the 2 best things to come out of my Pez years.

Psycho Lucy Pez dispenser. White paint on face instead of black. I asked Marco if he could make a Lucy Pez dispenser with white eyes. Somehow in translation this came out a White face Lucy Pez dispenser. So he created normal Lucy Pez dispenser but all face detailing done with white paint. This Pez dispenser was thought of because of the Lucy with White eyes. Marco created about 300 of this Pez dispensers for me. 

I named her Psycho Lucy because my first reaction when he showed this Pez dispenser to me was. She looks Psycho.

Most of what I did as Pez Outlaw was equal parts luck n perseverance. 
The key though is that you have to show up or luck just passes you by.
What a wonderful accident she was.

After Pez Outlaw, I intend to retire.
new profile pic captures my essence





Pez Outlaw Diary

Wednesday, August 9, 2017

RIP Old Man - See Ya, Buddeee! #pezoutlaw #hollywood @pezoutlaw


The Old Mans Eulogy
R.I.P.
1980-2017
37yrs.

The Old Man passed yesterday.
With his passing I felt my own mortality.

I never knew the Old Man except when he was older.
I believe he spent his last decade with us.

The reason Kathy took him in when he was no longer ride-able is that she'd seen to many sad stories of good horses tossed aside after there useful life ends.
The Old Man was given his Gold Watch n a good decade of ease.

The goofy bugger knew he didn't have to do another thing, except what he wanted to.
Every day at 5pm he'd start bugging me to let him into his stall for his grandpa food.
(2 scoops of senior n 1 scoop of strategy.) 

The old man walked his own path, no longer involving himself in the foolishness of the young horses.
Funny thing is I find myself emulating that very same choice.

None of the other horses messed with me as much as the Old Man.
The guy talked my ear off, n was a hay flinger (he'd grab a flake of hay from the bucket of the tractor n just toss it, making me have to go pick it up).

The Old Man also looked for every opportunity to sneak out the gate for yard grass.
Hay flinging or escaping I never got pissed, it was always for C.... Sakes Old Man or just simply "Dude Really".

The Old Man raised many children in his 37yrs, I was always hearing stories. 
I rode him when I was 3.
He lived down the road when I was a child.

One of his children Alex, came back to him in his last year n groomed him n walked him.
Alex spent his final moments with him.

It's tearing my heart to write this.
When our friends pass it reminds us.

The Old Man was my friend n I will miss him.
R.I.P. Khan.

I laid him to rest yesterday, now we pick his tree.

Farm Update.
10ee (horse) grabbed The Old Mans Gold Watch before it even hit the ground.
It's a good gig n he's no fool.



For more see
Carpe Diem, Judas #pezoutlaw #hollywood
The Way Home #pezoutlaw #hollywood #NFTA
On Behalf of Ground Pounders #horse #pezoutlaw #ho... 
Walking Quietly With Horse's #pezoutlaw #hollywood... 
Free Horses n Dogs #pezoutlaw #hollywood @pezoutla... 
Talking to Animals #pezoutlaw #hollywood @pezoutla... 

My dream is was that dk made the Pez Outlaw movie n jeff maysh ghost wrote the book so we could operate as an animal rescue n not go bankrupt doin it.
We're gonna keep doin what we  can, just woulda been nice to break even.
ea horse $2.00 worth hay per day, 18 horses x 365 = $13,140.00 per yr for just hay.
The movie n book woulda been nice.
It's a sin in life if you don't do something about a thing once you are aware of it.

Oh yeah n another "FREE" (meaning nobody else will take him) horse is on his way to the farm as we speak.
  *********************************************

Since we began here at Notes From The Asylum I've had occasion to write a few posts about Dogs n Horses.
From that information you most likely know that we have 18 horses n 4.25 dogs living on the farm at the moment.
Puddy/Tootsie baby Dachshund is the .25, she's very small.
I suppose by that math Tricksie should be counted as .33 of a horse.

Anyway, the point being lots of animals live here n everything depends on relationships.
Knowing the animals or better yet understanding them.
I've told you that I'm a ground pounder, meaning I no longer ride, not for 25 years.
My job is to take care of the horses, Feed them, Water them, clean up there poo.
I also maintain there fences, feeders n living quarters.

I do not train horses, but for the work that I do for them of which they are keenly aware.
I expect consideration, if in a situation that could go either way, I expect that the horses give that little bit to me out of appreciation.
To be honest if as horse does not, they are gone.
I'm happy to say that we have a very good group of horses here now, all the problem children are gone.

Here's the thing.
My babies see me working for things they want, a safe world to live in, food n water.
If a horse can't give me that little tilt that turns a potential disaster into a win for us both.
That's a horse I do not want to have around.
A horse that will not show a very small bit of consideration for my labor is a fool.

In the last few years I've come to recognize a very general form of communication from horses.
How they hold there head, ear position, how they shape there eyes, other micro expressions n body language.
No one thing but more an overall.
When combined with a situation you understand what a horse is saying.

Johnny being loaded to leave to a new potential home.
Very big soft eyes looking directly at me, resigned body language.
Johnny was asking to stay.
I told them immediately if it does not work out, bring him back, a week later Johnny returned.
Johnny struck the bargain, I will be a good horse n be friendly n considerate for your work.
Done deal John, you're home.

Red the horse. Red, Red, Red, Redneck.
Red bunged himself up good at his new home with someone we know.
It was not a good fit.
Red was sent here so his eye n leg could heal, she did not, not want him back.
Kathy said has he asked you yet.
Honey, that's all he's doing is asking, over n over n over.
Red struck the bargain, he said I see n appreciate what you do for me, I will be a good horse n be friendly n considerate.

Two Boys came to us a few years back Cowboy n Dub.
Both horses struck the deal happily, Boy n Dub had been #14 n #15 on a 15 horse pileup for food that was running low n out.
Good groceries n a few years n oh my gosh what beautiful boys they are.

Billy dog asked me if she was finally home when was still in the car that brought her here.
Yes Billy your home now.

Many of the horses that show up here have needs.
They need to heal, either from a physical injury or mental issues.
That care is a golden moment to find the inner horse, the good ones get it n a line of communication is opened during there recovery.
That intimate time of healing is where the bond n relationship can be formed.
Ole Roz took 3 years with a mental issue, but now she is my sweet baby.
I found by respecting Roz's boundary issues that she in turn gave me respect for recognizing her needs.
The other day Roz put her head in the doorway gently next to my shoulder.
Trust is a very big thing, my movement n behavior could be trusted.

I've noticed something else with a type of horse I like beyond a horse that is willing to strike a mutual bargain.
There are horses that have child like innocence, a purity of n open souls.
You can tell by the way they carry themselves n by what they think is fun.
Some horses are playful open n honest.
Cowboy will just follow Kathy around, he genuinely likes her.
Cowboy, Red n Jimmy are the best examples of this.
Damage a horse like this n you will go to hell.

Then you got the Old Man 36 = 108 in human years.
The Old Man is the biggest chatterbox on the farm, that guy has somethin to say about most everything.
Remind you of anybody.

I expect when crazy is happening that my dogs n horses behave.
Which brings us to the topic of today.
The neighbors 3 horses got out 3 times yesterday.
The first time I only heard about. 
The 4pm one I had to catch them. 
The 8pm one I had to catch them.

4pm. saw neighbors 3 horses just gettin it down the road toward my place while watering. 
put the hose down n started calling, come on babies I got ya.
With horses you want create a situation where the horse has 2 choices n one of them is one that they kinda want anyway, then move them toward the good choice.
Tried grain, you make noise in a bucket n most horses are like Pavlov's Dog to the sound.
No Go.
OK, got 2 flakes second cutting laid it in driveway midway up n worked my way behind them.
Lots of foolin round 10 minutes later got my hands on who by then saw was there leader.
Headed towards new barn/arena yellin Susan's name.
Got barn open took the big guy to stall #6.
Oh crap forgot to close barn door, other 2 headed back out.
10 minutes later recaptured them, closed the door this time.
Gave them each 2 flakes 1st cutting, best cause don't know what they're used to n a fresh bucket of water.
My part done, Susan drove down to tell the guy we had his horses.

Guy had been in yard cuttin wood, Horses just ran behind him sayin see ya.

Guy gets here, told him we're good.
Just did what Kathy would've expected.
I'll get my atta boy from her when she gets home.
Problem woulda been if I'd done less, then in Kathy's eyes I would have been found wanting.
So I'm good, just went from done early to done late, I'll get over it.

8pm.
Car pulls in, dogs go nuts, very nice lady at the door.
Hey steve, just almost hit 3 horses in the road, they yours.
Nope, guy down the roads.
I'm tired, remember I'm almost 65, see how smooth I play that card.
The problem is I actually have no choice, you see each night by 7pmish I tuck all my horses in for the night, one by one.
So all was good at 7:15pm, but horse running by can ryle everybody up so at the very least I gotta go out n retuck them all in.
I get out doin that n I see west of me cars in the road stopped headlights on horses in the road.
Well shit, somebody or an animal is just gonna get hurt.
Down the road I go talking to the horses, Hey Babies I got ya.
This time Big Boy comes right to me so a parade of me horses n cars starts down the dirt road in the dark lit by headlights.
A car comes from the other direction, it's a Nichols one of Lyle's boys.
Hey could you do me a favor, drive down n tell him I got his horse's, you know, again.
Good kid actual man, he did.
guy shows up midway between our houses, a bit of a walk for me.
Hey buddy long time no see.
Well least since about 6pm.
Hey Buddy you got stalls down there. 
He says yah maybe I better put them in them.
Me, yah maybe a good idea.
See yah.

Thing is, horse's some say aren't real bright but if they figure something out they are gonna keep doin it.
Cowboy is sure as shit that if he walks slow enough he can walk through a fence n he's been almost right a few times..
Me I turn the fencer on n he gets a poke n thinks better of the idea.
My horses though if they get out stay pretty much here.
Why, because they like it here n there friends are here.
Plus we all made the deal.
I work for them n they give me the benefit of the doubt in tricky situations.
Otherwise they are gone.

There are to many animals here for us to not cooperate, so everything runs smooth.
Foolish animals create chaos n I personally have no time n can't afford ignorant animals.
I make an effort n expect the same.

I care deeply for all of my animals but I expect that they listen when I ask them for a favor.

Out of nowhere n totally unrelated.
One of the best TV lines I've heard in a long time.
On Better Call Saul.
From Chuck to his brother Jimmy.
Giving a law degree from the University of Samoa to Slippin Jimmy is like giving a monkey a machine gun.
Soul Crushingly good dialog.

Pez Outlaw Diary

                           


Cowboy/Boy/Smokey


Short Horse Story

Roz n her 2 horse compadres got loose today.
Better than it sounds.
I had a choice when the first horse charged the gate, close the gate n god knows where that one ends up or run fast as I can n close the arena door. 
I chose option B, meaning all 3 got out but damage limited to inside the arena.

As Sloan would say, the neighbors learned some new curse words.
Then the coolest thing happened, after calling Roz a few times, she led the other 2 back into there pasture.
That a horse comes when you call it is pretty good on it's own, add to that 3 years ago I couldn't get within 10 ft of Roz because it scared her to much.
Oh yeah n Roz let me pet her head in front of her moms yesterday.

So you know, crisis averted.

News alert.
Billy Dog ran for her life.
3 horses charging at you is more than her internship as a horse dog could take.
We'll get'm next time Billy.
I'm not sure it wasn't the better part of valor in the situation.  

The rest of the story.

A while back Billy Dog got kicked in the side by a horse, it left a 2 inch hole.
Ripped her hide good.
So I think you can understand why Billy Dog is not real keen to take on 3 fast moving horses.

Here's the part that will surprise you.
Billy Dog wants with all her heart to be a herd manager.
Things stay where there supposed to n go where there supposed to.

That kick in Billies side gave her wisdom.