Thursday, July 20, 2017

BuBBaGooGoo #pezoutlaw #hollywood

BuBBaGooGoo is more an emotion than a word.
For it to have the intended sound in your head please pronounce BuBBaGooGoo like gooey.
It's the little details that give life joy.

Then again, is BuBBaGooGoo my entire life in 1 made up word? 
Life is/as Art.
Looking at facebook n twitter n in my head I heard "WOW TOUGH CROWD".
Take heart it plays really well in Czechia.
I'm like that country singer who's really popular in 1 country in Europe. 
see Him n Me - Pez Today #pezoutlaw #hollywood #NFTA

My hope is to share a world with you that you are maybe not aware of.
Bonus, when it amuses me to tell it.

Yesterday "New Laurie" said I was crackers, made her laugh in a good way.
Most people don't comment, is it avoiding the obvious?

Kathy said, you do realize n see it, right.
Had to tell her, actually no.

We've covered this, so I'll only make a brief mention.
A crazy person perceives the world through his eyes not yours, so that world seems normal unless someone points out the misconception.
I fabricate the world that I find pleasing n accept "normal's".

Why is that a thing?
I do not understand "normal's" n have no idea about there world, I just accept them n it.
We the crazies just try to fit in your world best we can so as not to stand out any more than necessary.
So the thing that shocks us isn't that you might think we are crackers, what surprises us is that we thought we were doing a better job at fitting in.
In previous posts I've referred to this gap between our efforts to fit n us not as slippage.

The truth is most people around us are to polite to point out the slippage.
So it can be a bit of a Whoa BuBBa when someone points it out as we are rattling on about something that amuses us.
This gap of perception can be disconcerting.

Good Dog
Billy Cuttin Dog

I just realized yesterday that for the first time that I know of in 50yrs I have a dog that is training me.
Billy Dog (Great Dane - female) is teaching me cues of communication.
Billy understands my language n what I'm asking her, her problem was I didn't understand her reply.
Smart as Billy is she decided that I might understand pantomime. 
So now when I ask her if she wants to go outside, she either happily goes or looks me square in the eyes n lays down.
I find this fascinating, Billy is designing a language so that she can communicate with me.

Billy Dog is extremely smart, she is always thinking n observing her world to find how to be useful.
Billy spent her 1st year somewhere else chained to a tree.
A very nice young man bought her when he saw it ($100.00) n brought her to me.
All Billy dog wants is to be a good dog.

Billy Dog is very observant, she's noticed changes n has decided taking care of Mom is her new job.
Billy is also working on her skills with horses.
Mom or I use a rough voice near a horse n Billy is there.
Billy knows where horses belong n she wants them to remember where they belong n go where they are supposed to go.
I see potential in Billy Dog's horse skills so I give her some latitude to find her way to useful.

The other day some horses were being potlickers to catch, as usual I told the miscreants if they didn't get in line I'd call Billy Dog.
They did not, so I did.
Billy Dog ran a line back n forth cutting them to a very small area, Works For Me.
This may have been a fluke, but I'm gonna build on it.
I see potential "Billy Cuttin Dog".

People say, is that a thing?
You know cause they've heard of herding dogs etc but not a cuttin dog.
Well if there is such a thing as a cuttin horse n there is, then there can be such a thing as a cuttin dog, cause Billy Dog invented it.
Remember, Great Dane were created by crossing Mastiff's n Greyhounds, so Billy Dog is extremely fast.
You thought Jordan had air time, Billy Dog can put it to shame.

The horses know who Billy Dog is, so when I threaten them with Billy Dog, they usually get right.
Billy Dog never touches a horse in any way, that's forbidden.

Billy Dog is destined to be one of the Best Dogs I've ever had, she has a lot of potential.
Billy Dog is always thinking n Billy Dog is always watching. 


I'd be remiss if I didn't mention.
Somebody is running a dog training video on this blog post.
I know how n have done the acceptable methods of dog training. 
Sit, stay, Heel, Blah Blah Blah.
My methods of training have evolved.
My number 1 goal is to save as much of the puppy as possible.

The training method I like best is conversational.
To observers it appears that I'm never training because my methods are just a continuous conversation with the dogs.
Recognized dog training is measured in weeks n months, my methods go on for years.
We communicate n move along at a very relaxed n leisurely pace.
Hell, I don't even care if my dogs know sit or lay on comand, not even relevant.
My goals are environmental n cohabitation training.
We talk.

I like to let a dog have a few quirks.
Billy Dog likes to dig really deep holes, it gives her great joy.
In the grand scheme of things, why in hell should this bother me.
I guide her areas of digging then encourage her to enjoy.
I've got a tractor, every so often I refill them n she gets the pleasure of beginning again.

Are my dog's well trained n well behaved?
Most visitors think so n even comment how well behaved they are.
Close enough for baseball.

Ying n Yang

The yang in that ying is PO/Proby Dog.
Proby is a "NUT".

Proby Dog has her fan base which seeks her out.
Po will be in one of her "I vant to be alone" mood n folks will walk way outa there way to pet her.
Proby Dog was never meant to be top dog or any kind of leader in our little pack.
The responsibility was thrust upon her after Rudy passed.
Po does not want the job, she's pushing Billy Dog to take that bullet instead of her.

Proby liked being a puppy for 4yrs.
Told you in a previous post about Po's fetish for TP.
Po also likes to carry things around, Mom's shoes, blankets, towels etc.
Pretty much anything.

Proby Dog is also a stone cold thief, cell phones, keys, brushes.
You leave it low enough for her to steal it n your just askin for it.
I warn n warn people but they keep leaving there stuff laying around.

Lastly Proby Dog has no idea of the meaning of the word no.
Po says, "what is this strange word you use, NO".
"I've never heard this word before".
N, I haven't the heart to explain it to her.

Proby is a pretty large Sprite/Free Spirit.
I think I went to far with Po on this whole save the puppy training method.
What am I gonna do?
Proby Dog was never destined to lead.
Po was always meant to be "OH Poby".

The plan is to buy Proby a puppy to raise.

After Pez Outlaw, I intend to retire.
new profile pic captures my essence

Pez Outlaw Diary

Wednesday, July 19, 2017

Pez Outlaw - SUPER HERO! #pezoutlaw #hollywood

Flamboyant Indeed, go big or go home.
The Adventures of PEZ OUTLAW - SUPER HERO!
I think I'm getting my MOJO back. Hap and Leonard reference.

tell a Pez Outlaw story that makes people wish they could be him n live the decade he lived

The following is a personal opinion not the result of a few million dollar study.
Possible side affects are as follows.

The Magic 10

To me we the middle class n poor seem to follow a life pattern.
We work and or mess up about the first 45yrs of our lives on somebody else's goals.
My theory is that the 10yrs between ages 45 n 55 are our potential awakening years.

By age 45 we've watched long enough n some of us have a few ideas of our own by then.
To me this decade between 45 n 55yrs of age is our magic moment.
This decade is our peak time to apply the youthful energy we have left on a goal of our own before our bodies start to slow down.

At 45 we have energy, means n knowledge to try something of our own
The trick is not to screw the pooch, well ................ um, like I did.
Your moves need to be measured, thoughtful n on point.

Do not get carried away. 
Do not get caught up in whatever success you may have.
This is your window to advance your families life not to become Bill Gate's.
You missed that window at 20.

Stay focused like a laser on the core goal n idea.
You tell yourself, if I fail this won't be the only good idea I have.
Again buddy you're not Steve Job's, this one might be all you get, so play it smart.

In My Magic 10 I earned 4.5 million dollars.
By year 11 I had lost everything.
Shit that sucked.

My mistakes were as follows.

I liked how people treated me n started believing what they said.
I started believing, well a lot of bullshit that wasn't real. 
Mirror Mirror etc.

I lost focus on for me the core product.
I spent a God awful lot of money on tangential items/merchandise.
I shoulda stuck to just in this case pez dispensers n dispensers only.

No Flix, Topp's, Fun Flips, pins, pez promo items, bags, rafts, skateboards or t-shirts etc.
No starting the California Pez Con, Hell they don't even acknowledge that Josh n I started it. (cost to me personally over $10,000.00 to put on first California Convention,

I flew over 6 staffers out, rented rooms, food, ballroom, advertising n all the prizes donated by me. n that doesn't count Kathy n my expenses. Then I gave the CA. Con to those 2 guys as we packed to leave. What a collasal waste of money n time)
I also gave away to much product to existing conventions etc.

I should not have sold wholesale.
I should have bought all I could then taken the next 2 or 3 decades to sell it myself.
I should not have hired so many people in my company.
I should have hired just Josh n Ri, period.

My biggest mistake was at the end.
I shoulda folded, but I doubled down.
I trusted the very company I knew despised me.
Pez corporation turned that trust against me n stole every idea I gave them.
In short, I was a schmuck.

I knew better n yet I did it anyway.
Not the first time, hopefully the last.

see Pez Outlaw Diary
C1. The Case Against Pez Corporation #pezoutlaw #h... 

Kathy said yesterday that I always told her I had more than 1 good idea.
Truth is I've had 3ish so far, I'm just praying I have one last one.

Do not waste your Magic 10yrs, be smarter than I was.
It's not about you, mess up n your whole family will suffer.

Minsky the Fargo Android Robot aka Unit MNSKY. Season 3 on FX ...
May 8, 2017 - Uploaded by netvelocityinc
... Minsky is the lovable Android Robot on FX's Fargo Season 3, Episode 3. ... Minsky the Fargo Android ...

"I can help"
This episode of Fargo was pure genius.

Mega block Busters yeah sure big bucks, the rest not so much.
By The Way, Who decide that Pez Outlaw wasn't a Super Hero?

Pez Outlaw is a story of hope for n to the middle class n poor of the Middle of this country.
Pez Outlaw connects with the portion of America you are not reaching anymore.

Data point.
Notes from the Asylum is a window into the mind of Pez Outlaw.
The overwhelming # of views are from Czechia, Slovakia n Russia the other less than half are from Fly over country USA.

Pez Outlaw is a story of the American dream, the possibility n of adventure beyond our poor n middle class dreams.
You need to tell a Pez Outlaw story that makes everybody wish they could be him n live the decade he lived.

Remember, Pez Outlaws happy ending could be him sitting in the shadows watching his movie being made during the closing credits.
That to the mentioner is "everything I ever wanted", WELL n a Pez Outlaw Book.

Just my albeit biased opinion. 
I get it I'm nobody n how could I possibly have this right?
Then again' Quentin Tarantino was a video store clerk.

It's like you've never even spoke to me about my actual story.
Oh yeah that's right, you never have.
What in the world have you got to lose by seeing what I think or my take.

You need customers who wish they could be Pez Outlaw. 
People buy Hope n dreams every day of the week, lottery tickets/scratch offs.
Pez Outlaw is the story of hope n dreams, if we win in the end..

with great regret, I've let go of jeff
After Pez Outlaw, I intend to retire.
new profile pic captures my essence

Pez Outlaw Diary

Tuesday, July 18, 2017

Enigma Protocol - Robotism #pezoutlaw #hollywood

Lately I've had the inescapable feeling that I've stuck my head through the looking glass n find it difficult to return.
The illusion clouds reality.
In short I'm at a crossroads putting faith in my subconscious for true north.

I put my hope in the collective illusion, loosing myself in the methods n beliefs of popular culture.
Unfortunately the veil is lifting exposing the shallowness.
Each day it becomes harder to deny. 

There is what I wanted to be true n there's what's actually true.
No more denial, I accept reality.
Rocks Float #pezoutlaw #hollywood @pezoutlaw #NFTA..

Robotism - a pathological dislike of robots.
compulsive, obsessive, inveterate, habitual, persistent, chronic, hardened, confirmed hatred  of robots.

After much soul searching I've decided that I just don't want to put the time, trouble or emotional effort into hating anyone.
Politics left or right, Trump, Nancy Pelosi, global warming etc.
There is not one thing I could, can or want to do concerning any of it.
To think my vocal support or disapproval makes the slightest bit of difference is delusional.

The problem is that we humans like a cause or to get worked up believing in or against something.
To that point I've decided to put all my need for a cause or hate of something into a fierce hatred of Robots.
Quite honestly Robots are as we all know destroying everything we as humans hold dear.
Soulless Robots are at the root of every problem we face today.

I have the deepest of hate for Robots n everything that goes wrong in my life, I lay blame at the feet of Robots.
We must stand together in defiance of the Robot plan to dominate humanity or be made obsolete one by one.
Damned accursed Robots, I spit upon your graves.

Likes - Bull Mastiffs n Dachshunds.

That's all I've got so far - work in progress.

I may have published Pez Outlaw Diary on Amazon as an ebook.
To be honest I'm dubious about whether I did or not.
I have no way of checking.
$2.99 USD

View on Amazon ASIN: B07362FPYG 
If I messed up n anybody can help me get it up correctly, the help would be appreciated. 

I have no choice.
Medical n financial issues are making things more immediate.
I wish time was not an issue.

If I can get Pez Outlaw Diary up for sale on Amazon.
Next I will Publish on amazon as ebooks.
Notes From The Asylum - top 100 posts
The Cereal Box Price Guide.
The Legend of Ghost Dog.

My biggest problem in doing this is that the books need to be compiled into a single download to amazon as 1 file n It's a bit beyond my skill set.Unlike google blog, with amazon you can't tinker with things, it's 1 n done.
offers of help from people I know would be appreciated. 

Here's something I think is cool.
Amazon has an option I can choose to offer Pez Outlaw Diary in paperback.
I mention this because of all the Pez People who've said that they'd like this.

When I was younger I searched for old guys with piles of weird leftover old stuff.
I'm now that old guy I used to seek.

Got a big pile of dirt from my kids on my 66th Birthday.

Just saw something.
Keep it vague.
I may not be your cup of tea, but at list it's not "Pee Pee, Poo Poo". 
After Pez Outlaw, I intend to retire.
new profile pic captures my essence

Pez Outlaw Diary

Monday, July 17, 2017

Rocks Float #pezoutlaw #hollywood @pezoutlaw #NFTA

What an interesting n odd way to look at something.
My guess is you clicked this post hunting for an enlightening metaphor. 
Of course there is one but not today, today it's about the other things that give me joy.

Yes rocks float, to clarify in dirt.
Have you ever noticed how rocks seem to work there way up to the surface.
There's a point to this. 

Over the last week I've been working on a kinda big project.
Moving a barn n creating a circle drive.
Barn was in a bog n smack in the middle of where I wanted to put the circle drive.

I'd put a large amount of rocks at the entrances to the barn.
Well if I'd left them there they'd have just work up n killed the mower.
So I dug them all out n used them as a base for the drive.

The project is going well, but it would go better if I had any money.
What I wouldn't give for 5 six inch 8ft fence posts, 6 of 12ft 4x4s n 6 sheets of 3/4 OSB.
Make do n increase the labor quotient.

Temp is about 80 now n the work has been brutal.
Chores, manure removal, getting hay, then the projects.
4 hrs to mow, then weed whacking, plus the gardens.

Yesterday was stump removal day, got 5 of them out, 3 to go.
Did I mention that I do this shit alone.
Well me the tractor n Billy Dog.

This morning I got up n to my surprise I felt pretty good.
Felt like crapp for about a week.
Just plain wore out.

When I was a child I played football in 9th n 10th grade.
Workouts began in August.
We're talking exercise till you puke workouts.

This spring has been that same kind of rough.
10 days ago I thought I was getting back in shape after winter.
Silly Rabbit.

The last week has been a whole new level of tired.
You push up to the line n hydrate.
Collapse n do it again the next day n the next day.

I know where the line is.
Muscles start cramping from fatigue.
You needed to stop half hr ago. 

Hydrate, Hydrate, Hydrate.
I drink 48 oz of water in summer each day while I work.
I also drink 16 oz of Electric Lights liquid. 

Electric lights is intentional so no comments.
I'll live in my world, you live in yours.
My ways more fun.

Then you wake up one morning n you don't feel to bad.
Actually feel kinda good.
I like work, it keeps the mind busy.

Anyway, Rocks Float.

I just realized something.
I'm not invested in any particular post.
Me, just talking. 
I'm perfectly happy to let readers decide what they like.

here's what you think.

Thank you.
I really appreciate it.

After Pez Outlaw, I intend to retire.
new profile pic captures my essence

Pez Outlaw Diary


Sunday, July 16, 2017

Big Fish Mystery #pezoutlaw #hollywood #NFTA

I used to think that all sorts of things really mattered n were worth getting upset about.
Not so much anymore.

Case File 19. 

13 years ago I was in Paris.
No idea what the future held.
Do I really want to know?

Shadows fall.
How do I fit my dreams into this reality?
The Absurdity of life is intoxicating.

Don't tell people what you know is true.
Wear the face people expect to see. 
Mustn't appear different.

I keep going back to 51% Sane.
Are you ready for what's coming?
Maybe I wasn't

Bones in the crawl space? 
If not for crazy, reality would kill me. 
The shame of Time lost.

The cycle repeats.
My Angel is gone. 
Maybe Today.

Nothing is fixed.
Neglected past, unrecognized present.
Fantasy the last refuge.

The tears of a child for his future.
A window from that moment to this?
Is it yet to come?

I can't control how others see me.
That's their truth.
Crazy would be to try.

I came here expecting nothing.
Truth revealed itself.
Shame fell away.

A liberating truth.
Labels became assets.
Clarity, before darkness claims it's own.

WINNER n Still Champion, Big Fish, 6,300 views.
4 posts in Notes From The Asylum have well over 4,000 views each.

NFTA currently is at 475,000 views overall. 
My twitter page has had approx 5million impressions.


"Do Not Go Gentle Into That Good Night" by Dylan Thomas

I like to think of life like the the stars in the sky.
Each star is a moment in time or a thought.
With NFTA I try to pluck some of those moments to create a stream of thought.

I understand that abstract thought is not every-bodies cup of tea.
Those that don't get or like it, don't.
Those that do, I treasure.

Life is just the agreed upon version of crazy.
My search is connect the unconnected dot that we usually can't see.
Big Fish was a gift, that I'm very grateful for.

The title always comes first.
The words fall down underneath it.
The Universe in all its forms will speak to you if you are listening.

I have no use for the past n little for the present.
My interest is the moments in between.
Moments of clarity, a brief conversation with the unseen.

Reality is tedious, but moments of clarity are delicious.
I live each day in the hope of those brief moments.
I don't get them every day or even once a week, but often enough that I wait for each one.

That's why I'm so grateful for Big Fish.
The title is the key that unlocks the door.
Within is that which feeds my soul. 

Abstract thought is like dancing between raindrops n not getting wet.
The raindrops of the past, the present n the future.
What I want can only be found between the drops of rain.


I really like Big Fish Mystery.
In my attempts to create abstraction with words, to date it's my best.
I really hope that you agree. 

Big Fish is now at over 5,000 views n at the top of my A-List. 
When you love something it feels really good to see approval. 

? some perspective might shed light.
I have cut approx 300 of the 520 posts I've written.
It used to be I cut a post if it only achieved 250 views in say 4 months.
Now posts with 500+ views get cut, I only want the best on Notes From The Asylum.
Very soon that bar will be any post with less than 1,000 views will get cut from NFTA.
Number of views are like ratings here at the Asylum, just like TV low ratings get cut.

Notes From The Asylum is just under 2yrs old.
It used to take 6months to a year for a post to hit 1,000 views.
Only 2 other posts have had this type of success out of the 500 posts I've written n the 194 that have survived on NFTA.
That said though over a dozen posts are now at over 2,000 views ea.
1 post is at over 4,000 views, 2020 ☑️ PEZ OUTLAW FOR PRESIDENT #pezoutlaw #holly...

Of all the things I've done in my life, I would find the most gratification in Notes From The Asylum being published. 
NFTA is creation n I love that most of all.

Within the next 2 months Notes From The Asylum will reach a very big milestone.
Unfortunately, to broadcast it might not be something I should share.


To my knowledge Congress nor the President are going to pass a law giving Pez Outlaw success.

So Forgive me, I just feel if my life is gonna change, I gotta do it.
Various administrations come n they go, my destiny is up to me.
So Holidays etc, I continue to work. 

Other peoples good fortune is there's not mine.
I choose not to live through there success or failure.
To do so would diffuse my efforts. 

Congratulations n good luck but honestly it will not change my life.
Only my efforts can be mine or change my life.
That said we continue, I have daily goals that must be met. 


Today my mood like my Boots has a lot of mud on it.
Have you ever noticed how your mood reflects the weather?

Yesterday one of the gals had a really good day with her horse.
She was walking around on cloud 9 n didn't want the day to end.

It's all perspective isn't it.
I've been slogging around in 4 inches of mud for 4 days now, so my perspective is different.

It's all where you stand.
Nice hard ground n enclosed arena or out in the pens like me n the horses.

Of all the posts I've written in Notes From The Asylum, Big Fish n Secrets are my favorites. 

Totally off subject.
Recently I was made aware of a Blue Dog needing a home.
I just couldn't, I need a Big Red Dog.
Like Maggie Thatcher said, I'm getting Wobbly.
Big Red Dogs (Bull Mastiff's) are my Spirit Guides. 
Yes, I believe in that stuff with all my heart.
It's been to long.

Just dawned on me, maybe that's her name.

When you ask to be friended or follow me, make sure it's what you really want, because I'm relentless in pursuit of my goals.


Pez Outlaw Diary

Saturday, July 15, 2017

2020 ☑️ PEZ OUTLAW FOR PRESIDENT #pezoutlaw #hollywood #NFTA

2020 Campaign Slogan.
If it's good enough for Urkel, it's good enough for me. 

Old men start slow. 
It takes 4 years to get our momentum going.
In 2016 I ran a 4 week campaign, for 2020 I figured I'd run a 4 year campaign.
Failure is no excuse for not trying again. 

To those who chant the mantra against "The Permanent Campaign". 
Yo Mama.

I intend to spend the same amount of money in my 2020 run for President as I did in my 2016 run. ZERO! 
I figure if I can get the CRAZY vote  that I'm a shoe in for President in 2020.
What? I waited 4 weeks to announce.

I view life as performance art.
Pez Outlaw For President.

Wouldn't it be cool if there was a Pez Outlaw For President pin like this of above pic.

I'm crowd funding votes for Pez Outlaw for president

I'm attempting to crowd fund your write in vote for Pez Outlaw for president as publicity to get a book published.

It's for the children

It's for the children, puppies n kittens.

I'm a Strong believer in nepotism, I Will fill as many positions as possible with family members.

the caliber of my appointees..

If elected President I only think it's fair to give you an idea of the caliber of my appointees..

Thank You, Thank You Very Much

Campaign song, Hay, Hay, Poo, Poo............

Every Dead person that can should get out n Vote Pez Outlaw for President


Presidential Qualifications
I shovel Horse Shit for a living.

Every Presidential election year a lot of Americans decide to not vote for any of the candidates for President on the ballot. These voters instead choose to write in a name of there own for President as a gesture of defiance concerning what is on offer. These write in votes are a right in our election process but unfortunately count very little in the end. My hope is that if you are going to write in a candidate for President that you make your protest in the name Pez Outlaw. If I can get enough people who write in a candidate for president to write in Pez Outlaw a secondary good will come from your act of protest. Your vote might also have the secondary effect of getting me a book deal. 

Your write in vote will gain you nothing, so why not let it do some good for somebody else. ME! To address a concern you might have as to how good a writer I actually am. For this book I'm trying to get published with the help of you writing in Pez Outlaw for President. I'm already under contract with the ghost writer Jeff Maysh who wrote the April 2015 Playboy story The Pez Outlaw see-   which won 2 writing awards. see- Pez Outlaw Wins 2 Awards #pezoutlaw #hollywood    

So I'm asking you to Vote Pez Outlaw as a write in for President. You know that you are going to do it anyway, all I'm asking is that you let that act of protest have a secondary good by making your write in vote for president be Pez Outlaw.

I love this straight jacket pic.

Because there are so many voices/personalities in my head, my campaign is fully staffed.
Pez Outlaw for President.   

I plan to campaign sorta hard when I have time

I plan to campaign sorta hard when I have time #pezoutlaw #hollywood: VOTE, PEZ OUTLAW FOR PRESIDENT on Nov. 8, 2020

I want to recycle your write in protest vote for president into something new, a Pez Outlaw Book. Vote Pez Outlaw for President.

My philosophy on life is this. You never give up, never give in n never quit trying. Try everything no matter how foolish others might think you are for attempting it. That you do is what separates you from those who only wish for things. I have now spent almost 2 decades on this 1 project, that's the dedication to a dreams fulfillment that it takes.

I have zero money, but even that to me is no excuse. As always the trick is to find the loophole n exploit it. I have my story so for me this time that loophole is the great equalizer of the internet. With the internet I can without money pursue my dream of a Pez Outlaw book. If you write in Pez Outlaw for president this year, my dream of a book could come true.

At first glance I accept how crazy this idea seems, but if people who write in a vote for president choose Pez Outlaw, it will work.
That old thing, it's so crazy, it might just work.

Pez Outlaw For President, Recent campaign rally.

Donald trump might get 10,000 to 15,000 people at a rally, but look how many people we got in a phone booth.

Yes we held a campaign rally in a phone booth, it was the only place we could get, but we packed em in. 

Cabinet Meeting of my administration

I promise as President to do absolutely nothing except take pointless trips on Airforce 1 n play Golf.

From the big brain room

VOTE, PEZ OUTLAW FOR PRESIDENT has 3,200 views so far.  
Pretty good for one of my posts. 
My #1 post is VOTE, PEZ OUTLAW FOR PRESIDENT on Nov. 8 #pezoutlaw.
In my reality, only my numbers are relevant.

It's official.
VOTE, PEZ OUTLAW FOR PRESIDENT on Nov. 8 is now the highest viewed post on Notes From The Asylum.
Yes, I Hammered it to get there.

I'm shamelessly seeking validation n approval, hence the following.

Google+ Followers, please give VOTE, PEZ OUTLAW FOR PRESIDENT post a G+1 positive feedback.

Within insanity, find good
Out of chaos, find purpose
Solutions are found in the most unlikely of places
To find answers, you must have eyes that can see
Faith n belief in yourself, will carry you  

This crazy pretend world I've created is where I find refuge from the harsh n painful realities of life. My dreams are what sustain me. All my crazy schemes give me hope.

Now, On With The Show

I'm campaigning for the Mickey Mouse, Evan McMullin, Gary Johnson n Jill Stein Vote. 

Why Not, could I possibly be worse?

America has a long n proud history of crazy people running for President.
My turn.

"As President, I Pez Outlaw couldn't possibly do worse."
Pez Outlaw for President yard sign.
Pez Outlaw for President, Better than Mickey Mouse. 

It's a race to the bottom for President, Vote Pez Outlaw for President because I'm it.
So if you're looking for the bottom of the barrel for President, look no further, Pez Outlaw. 
In a year of bad choices for President, Why not make the worst choice, Pez Outlaw.

Are you better off than you were 8yrs ago?
Things could be worse, Vote Pez Outlaw for President. 

A Vote for Pez Outlaw is a vote for ummmmmm yup change.

If elected I promise a 1957 Ford Truck in every garage.
You'll thank me later, after the pulse.

Pez Outlaw for President Campaign slogan.
My best friend has a favorite stick.
Though her favorite stick changes every few days, they wear out.

I  know a lot of folks are terribly conflicted this year n are gonna write in a crazy name in protest.
I'm here to ask for that vote.
Write in any other name is just a shameful waste. 
Make your write in vote PEZ OUTLAW for president because I might get a book deal out of it.
From my perspective that vote then would not have been wasted. 

Think of your write in vote of PEZ OUTLAW for president as crowd funding a book deal for me.

Every Presidential election year a significant number of people vote for Mickey Mouse.
I'm asking for the Mickey Mouse vote.
Let's make it Pez Outlaw this time.

I know a lot of people are ashamed to say who they are voting for right now.
Say PEZ OUTLAW for President with pride. 

If mistakenly elected President, I promise to only serve 90 days, just long enough to get a great retirement package.

As President I promise that all my speeches will be pointless rambling about nothing n made up stuff.
As president many of my speeches would simply be "Dude" then, he gone.

As President I would rent out every room in the White House like a bed n breakfast to raise money to pay down the National debt. 

As President I would turn the White House front lawn into a horse pasture for the Old Man n his Buds. 

As President all motorcades would include me on my tractor moving at a snails pace. 

As President besides doing nothing, I promise to also stand for nothing. 

I promise as President it would be like I wasn't even there. 

But Wait There's More, Act now n..........

Here's the book Pez Outlaw Diary 
It's FREE online to read, right now.

After Pez Outlaw, I intend to retire.


Pez Outlaw Diary

Friday, July 14, 2017

Secrets #pezoutlaw #hollywood #NFTA

Pez Outlaw
My grandson wants my life n I want my dog Proby's life.

Why are people determined to draw you into the things they find interesting?
I refuse to waste my time on all the useless endeavors of others.
Computer n Cell Phone obsession is the worst, what a bunch of drivel.
Please attend this or join me at that.
Then the guilting, but it would make me happy if you did.
Does it count for nothing that it would make me miserable n potentially suicidal? 
People need to hear the word NO more.
You say NO nowadays n people react like you killed a puppy.

Revealing truth is liberating.
Withholding truth makes you vulnerable.
Secrets are a cancer on your soul.
Yet life is filled with secrets.

You can't live without relationships.
Though the maintenance is set with Booby-traps.
One wrong step n that spiky thing comes at you.
When did it get so complicated.

You'd think honesty would protect you.
Some days I get wore out from careful conversation. 
The truth is, you can't be honest with people.
Total honesty repels people. 

I just apologized to a friend for saying what's on my mind.
I wish it was the first time.
I told him that I seem to have a talent for making people not want to talk to me.
Just an observation, how much it matters I'm uncertain of.

So you hold your thoughts close.
Until that one person who gets you, Joshua my son says something.
N you almost scream in response, Yeah!
The response is almost a cry of relief.

Then Joshua says something else n again halfway though you shout, YEAH!
Thinking all the while, Why don't others seem to see it.
Then Josh says people are telling him he's becoming more like me by the day.
It was inevitable, I am my father, Joshua is me n Danny or Jake will be Joshua.

So what's the point?
There is none, just frustration.
People say they want the truth or an honest answer, but they really don't.
They want to hear whatever version makes them feel OK with themselves.

Problem is that I usually know what I want and what I think.
Where I get in trouble is when I share it.
Are there rules I don't know how to follow?
Is this written down somewhere?

I've met people who look scared at the thought of saying what they want.
N if you press them, it angers them, like I'm somehow not respecting the process.
I see this over n over and I still don't understand it.
I am willing to accept what I want, To some what they want is a process.

People say I get there to quick, n that I'm impatient.
The thing is that I know what I want n time is slipping away.
With Pez, What made me different?
Really simple. I saw something n I acted on it, while others thought about acting. 

I'm as puzzled today at almost 65 as I was a child of 5. 
I'm not delusional, I don't think that this is brilliant. 
I'm just purging. 
My imaginary shrink says I need to write things down.

It's like I told Josh, write it out straight, then make it abstract.
Because if you say it straight it offends people.
Keep it vague n people can interpret the meaning to there liking.
Truth can be liberating but it can also be cruel or unwanted.

That n I believe I push to hard.
For which I'm truly sorry.
But we know I won't change.
It's like the scorpion n the river, It's my nature.

I will say this though.
I may know what I think from given information.
Though I have no idea what that information will be.
Meaning, I have no idea what the future holds.

I know what I want but it's in the hands of those pesky relationships.
N Yup you guessed it, they don't want to talk to me.
A Feller could get a complex, were it not for ego. 
I'm OK, You're OK. Are we good?

I remain. 
Not a Damn clue. 
Pez Outlaw.

Thank God, it's time for therapy.
Smiley Face, today we get Jello or is it Pudding?
See what I mean?

My imaginary Shrink says, It only matters if you pretend to know if it's pudding or Jello. 

The Title should have been Jello or Pudding. 
Should I change it?
I like my life, I do things the way I like.
Example is the 4 line verse I use here, just because I like it.

We went on a deep dive today.
Hopefully it was amusing. 

Of all the posts I've written in Notes From The Asylum, Big Fish n Secrets are my favorites.
After Pez Outlaw, I intend to retire.
new profile pic captures my essence

Pez Outlaw Diary


Thursday, July 13, 2017

Him n Me - Pez Today #pezoutlaw #hollywood #NFTA

Saddle Up n Put on Your Rain Poncho's boys n girls.
I'll show you how it should be.
You only think you've seen crazy?
The best is yet to come.

Pez Today Lacks Vision
It needs a Wham Bam Thank You Mam Crazy Person to add some creative mythology.
In short, more story, more depth n more of a creative input, more performance art as narration.

I say this for many reasons.
Starting with, 
How long can Pez Corporation live off my old ideas, "crystals, glow in the dark n color variations".
How much money would I have if I'd received just 1 penny for every Bubble man, Crystal, glow in the dark or color variation dispenser Pez corp has sold since 1998.
My guess, well over $100,000.00.

The above is my resumes for the job of kick starting another revival of Pez like I did before.
Pez Outlaw, Can you still bring the crazy that's needed?
Does a bear poo in the woods?
Sheldon that means YES! 

This time though you'd get more of a Howard Hughes Pez Outlaw than the sj glew Pez Outlaw of old.
Would that be a good thing?
Yes, a mysterious reclusive Pez Outlaw adds Myth, much written by necessity of the absence of data.
Also, if The New Pez Outlaw is a recluse, doesn't that make the few sightings of him more of an event worthy of attending.

Yes I write about Pez Outlaw in the 3rd person.
2 reasons.
1. I view Pez Outlaw as a character that embodies that part of my life.
2. If I can separate myself from him n I can (diagnosed schizophrenic in 1969) then I can as an outsider manage n promote him/Pez Outlaw.

To tell you the truth, Pez Outlaw n I are 2 very different people that bleed over into each other.
Me, I'm a recluse, not an extrovert characteristic in my body.
Pez Outlaw is larger than life itself n I really like him.
I can pour all the things I wouldn't n couldn't do into him.
Pez Outlaw is like a surrogate (Bruce Willis movie) I can step into to enter your world.

This though does create quite a few schisms between Pez Outlaw n myself.
Pez Outlaw believes all things I write about are possible n likely.
Me, not so much because I'm the skeptic.
Pez Outlaw thinks there will be a movie or that Pez Corp would of course make the Pez Outlaw collection.
On the other hand I myself believe both have a snowballs chance in hell.
Truth is that I let him run with those fantasies because it makes him happy n what harm is there in letting him believe.
Kinda like, Why would you tell a 5yr old that there's no Santa Claus.
It makes him happy.

I'm not sure that I should've revealed those truths, might adversely affect dk, jeff n Pez Corp.
Is it a good idea to let dk, jeff n pez corp know that you view them as a waste of time that you indulge to pacify one of the personalities in your head.
At that I'm leaving out Biff Rose n Thorn-apple Trees.
Screw it, you deserve the truth, just this once.
So you've got perspective for the future. 

This one addendum to the above.
I may not believe in those mentioned but I do believe in Pez Outlaw.
I'm not the problem as repeatedly told (yeah that really stuck in my craw), 
I'm the solution.
Ammmmmm..... I mean He Is. Pez Outlaw, you know not me?

I didn't say all that, He Did.
the guy in the pic. so blame him not me.

On the collector side it also lacks vision.
I  recently offered 2,500 banks at .75cents per.
Cheap right! But it seems the ability to see how you could sell or use that many is gone.
I used to buy up to 10,000 per type of a dispenser knowing I could sell them all.
The vision is so much smaller now.

Fantasy Pez
They scare the hell out of me as to the future of Pez Collecting.
Best example a guy showing a Kooky Zoo Elephant clear blueish he created talking about his discovery of pressure method or something.
When the line between real n fantasy blurs this much, it is not a good thing.

Known Universe is becoming to large to wrap your mind around.
Say 1,000 known dispensers in approx 1994.
Today triple that n Pez Corp is going crazy creating everything they can license or imagine.
There needs to be a new demarcation point, similar to no feet to footed.
This is way over due.

This morning I'm listening to Serious XM The Highway n the dj is talking about a singer traveling in Europe.
For the first time in a decade n a half I thought, Yeah I could do that again.
You have to wonder how Pez Corp would feel about a resurgence of Pez Outlaw in there lives.

With all I've written, here's something still untold.
I've never written or told anyone who my real contacts were.
I've protected these sources for over 2 decades n never will reveal them.
Yes I've mentioned some, but only the unimportant ones.
No matter how rough things have gotten, even when offered money, I've declined.
You can't buy or sell relationships.

Pez Outlaw Diary Book publishing rights 4sale by owner 75k

My impression from ebay is that Pez is in a slump.
David has MMM's I sold 20yrs ago for $25 to $35 at $26.00.
Generally I just don't see enthusiasm.

Makes me think Pez needs a good kick in the pants.
Would a big Pez Outlaw thingy be just the medicine?
A nationwide whamp of excitement n spotlight.

By now you all know me better from my writing in Notes From The Asylum.
I really don't like the spotlight, I prefer my quiet life.
If this thing happens I will make it about Pez Outlaw n Pez not me.

My hope is that all of you will use this opportunity for yourselves n the hobby of collecting Pez.
I have absolutely no problem with stepping back n letting you all have some fun with it.
Like Chancy Gardener said, "I like to watch".

Once this happens I believe it would be better served by a thousand points of light than one.
I won't need to tell you when to begin, it will be obvious.
Step forward n use it with my blessing, the more you do, the less I will have to. 

Lately I've become a fan of the pre2016 British Top Gear, because those guys were seriously nuts. (I don't care who hit who, FUNNY IS FUNNY! quit being so PC n fix it. comedy is supposed to be irreverent n anarchistic.) more (I'm not saying Matt Lablanc n that other guys 2016 show is awful, It's just not the Top Gear I like with Captain Slow, The Hamster n the Big Ape.)
The point is the crazy stuff Jeremy says in his intros to The Stig.
Make up all kinds of outlandish stories n recollections of Pez Outlaw.

The crazier the better.
Who am I to say it's not true. 
Pez Outlaw needs to become as much myth as Legend.
1st known photo of Pez Outlaw - 1957

Pez Outlaw once walked the entire length of the Great Wall of China backwards because he thought he was being followed.
Pez Outlaw was offered the Presidency of Pez Corporation but couldn't afford the pay cut. 
Certain facts in the History of Pez Outlaw are true, but that doesn't mean everything needs to be.

Pez Outlaw came to being because of Pez n the Hobby of Collecting Pez.
In that sense Pez Outlaw n his story belongs to you also.
So have fun with it, "It's always better to ask forgiveness than Permission".

I mentioned how major dealers are selling pez at or below what I sold for 20 yrs ago.
To illustrate.

Pez I bought under questionable providence, I paid $1.25 each. 
Add to that the following costs;
Ticket to Europe n back approx $800 to $900.00
Car approx $500. to $800.00
Hotel $300 to $500.00
Extra luggage fee approx $300.00
Food etc $300.00

Point being any pez I brought into the USA from Europe had a base cost of approx $2.00 ea.
I'm just saying that I do not understand the low prices I'm seeing on ebay.

If? IF!
We'll see what we can do about that.
One last ride by Pez Outlaw.

If it happens Saddle Up n Put on Your Rain Poncho's boys n girls.
I'll show you how it should be.

Ask the folks who were at the conventions we attended.
They'll tell you what good times look like. 

True or False

Josh n I once ran around a Pez Convention in Gorilla Costumes. True.

I once turned over half a refrigerator box of Pez in the middle of the floor of a Pez Convention as a free mad scramble give away. True. actually twice, Cleveland n LA.

Pez Outlaw once drove his rental car through a mall area in downtown Vienna. True.

Pez Outlaw was held at gun point by Police/Military. True, this happened at least 2 to 3 times.

Anyway that's it for today.
Time to go be EB, putting final touches on tin horse shed today.
Yippie it's done, now on to the circle drive.

I thought this post was fun, hope you did to. 
1200 views in 48hrs. thank you so much for your support. 

Psycho Lucy

Psycho Lucy is probably one of the most underrated Pez dispensers ever made in a very short run. approx 300 were made, current value is $100 to $150.00

Psycho Lucy, one of Pez Outlaw's children.
Psycho Lucy was the first in a long line of Pez Outlaw Pez dispensers. Thank god this one was not duplicated by Pez USA.

Psycho Lucy is one of my fondest memories.  Black Santa n Psycho Lucy were the 2 best things to come out of my Pez years.

Psycho Lucy Pez dispenser. White paint on face instead of black. I asked Marco if he could make a Lucy Pez dispenser with white eyes. Somehow in translation this came out a White face Lucy Pez dispenser. So he created normal Lucy Pez dispenser but all face detailing done with white paint. This Pez dispenser was thought of because of the Lucy with White eyes. Marco created about 300 of this Pez dispensers for me. 

I named her Psycho Lucy because my first reaction when he showed this Pez dispenser to me was. She looks Psycho.

Most of what I did as Pez Outlaw was equal parts luck n perseverance. 
The key though is that you have to show up or luck just passes you by.
What a wonderful accident she was.

After Pez Outlaw, I intend to retire.
new profile pic captures my essence

Pez Outlaw Diary