Friday, April 8, 2016

#92Crazy #pezoutlaw #hollywood #timetraveler @pezoutlaw

I can't help reflecting on how things have changed this morning.
For me the 1990s were the Roaring 90s.
Travel and Deals at the drop of a hat.
Money was just a tool and easily obtained.

Deals for $10,000.00 were small ball.
I did that as a baseline once a month.
The deals I sought were for $25,000 n $30,000.
Decisions were made in minutes on handshakes.

Now, well now things are different.
My biggest deal back then was for $1/2 to $3/4 million dollars in one year.
Today getting $3,000.00 is very difficult.
Things sure have changed.

My mind still thinks like the 90s but reality won't cooperate, except here.
I really find it difficult to cope with.
I try to do things the way I used to, but today everybody has to think about it.
Unfortunately my bills are not patient.

These things take time, be patient, it's only been a year.
Maybe for you but I've already been patient for 15 years.
I've been so patient that I think I might loose my mind.
You ever feel that pain inside where need n hope crash against each other like giant waves?

So I try another way because I'm nothing if not resourceful and it too is met with process.
I get it, it's the smart way to decide, even if it's a foreign language to me.
Won't pay for last years hay or buy the hay I need today though.
The clash of the way things are done today verses my needs today is stark.

The world around me is at odds with it's very self.
When I need or want, I must be patient while decisions are made.
When the world needs n wants from me, I must act immediately.
Yeah, that's the fun part isn't it.

I'm told that I need to work on being patient.
I've had some product 15 years waiting for it to sell.
With Pez Outlaw I've been working on it also 15 years now.
To me, I've been very patient.

Patience is very much in the eye of the beholder.
If you've come to something recently, you wish the other party to be patient.
As the other party I've been here for over a decade, I thought that was the definition of patience. 
10yrs is what People get for serious crimes, by that standard I've done hard time. 

Look, I'm not gonna go rouge or anything.
I'm gonna be good n wait, but things get kinda sticky out here some times.
So I write about it.
I keep it vague n abstract so all parties on various fronts don't pop a cork but shit I'm goin nuts.

I know in my heart that all this will pass, it always does.
One day I will be on the other side of this struggle n wish it hadn't gotten to me like it has.
That knowledge helps me maintain optimism.
I just wish that day will come soon.

If I could smoke marijuana I'm sure things would be easier.
I'd just get me a Michigan prescription n relive my youth.
2 problems with that though.
It ain't ditch weed nomore brother n I'd probably go nuts.

I know, short trip, BUD!
Oh yeah n Kathy would skin me alive. 
Reality is this.
I enjoy people who view Notes From The Asylum, but I do this for me. 

I can run around in crazy town only so long.
Then I must poke my head out.
She can't do this alone.
Because that's not fare either. 

I will though make crazy pay if it's the last thing I do. 
On that note we end this group therapy session.
Like AA, My name is Pez Outlaw.
Hello @#$ %^&*!?  

After Pez Outlaw, I intend to retire.
new profile pic captures my essence

Pez Outlaw Diary

No comments:

Post a Comment