Sunday, April 10, 2016

Yestorow #pezoutlaw #hollywood @pezoutlaw

Yesterday

Just over the Horizon
Scales out of balance
Praying for a cure
 
Creeping momentum
Walls closing in
Purge the thought


Anxiety levels high
Patience all time low
Tedium creeps in 

Small Bites
All this time
Anothers caution

Livin on Dreams
Paying with promises
Times running out 

Shape reality
Make it palatable 
Send out the mail



Today

The way we view our lives.
Each day we wake to the same given set of facts about our life.
Some days we are weighted down by them, on others we move past.

The facts about our lives don't change day to day.
How we view them does.
What's the magic that makes it different?

Yesterday I was Mr Suck.
Today I'm coming out of it.
Nothing changed except my mood.

I believe there are days each month that I'm unable to find perspective.
Luckily these last in n out 3 days.
But like clockwork each month with the full moon they come.


Tomorrow

Tomorrow is a message of hope.
You see I actually don't mind being poor.
It's the debt I don't like.

Everything I do is toward the goal of successfully completing Pez Outlaw.
Once Pez Outlaw has achieved it's goal, I will be happy to go silent.
That message is to parties who may have concerns.

If you choose to go forward.
I am if you choose perfectly willing to go silent.
I only do this to keep Pez Outlaw out there.

Once the goal is attained my purpose here has ended. 

This is BIG.
Notes From the Asylum has passed The Cereal Box Price Guide in views.
That's BIG because The Asylum has been up less than 1/3 the time Cereal has.

After Pez Outlaw, I intend to retire.






 

Pez Outlaw Diary

Friday, April 8, 2016

#92Crazy #pezoutlaw #hollywood #timetraveler @pezoutlaw

I can't help reflecting on how things have changed this morning.
For me the 1990s were the Roaring 90s.
Travel and Deals at the drop of a hat.
Money was just a tool and easily obtained.

Deals for $10,000.00 were small ball.
I did that as a baseline once a month.
The deals I sought were for $25,000 n $30,000.
Decisions were made in minutes on handshakes.

Now, well now things are different.
My biggest deal back then was for $1/2 to $3/4 million dollars in one year.
Today getting $3,000.00 is very difficult.
Things sure have changed.

My mind still thinks like the 90s but reality won't cooperate, except here.
I really find it difficult to cope with.
I try to do things the way I used to, but today everybody has to think about it.
Unfortunately my bills are not patient.

These things take time, be patient, it's only been a year.
Maybe for you but I've already been patient for 15 years.
I've been so patient that I think I might loose my mind.
You ever feel that pain inside where need n hope crash against each other like giant waves?

So I try another way because I'm nothing if not resourceful and it too is met with process.
I get it, it's the smart way to decide, even if it's a foreign language to me.
Won't pay for last years hay or buy the hay I need today though.
The clash of the way things are done today verses my needs today is stark.

The world around me is at odds with it's very self.
When I need or want, I must be patient while decisions are made.
When the world needs n wants from me, I must act immediately.
Yeah, that's the fun part isn't it.

I'm told that I need to work on being patient.
I've had some product 15 years waiting for it to sell.
With Pez Outlaw I've been working on it also 15 years now.
To me, I've been very patient.

Patience is very much in the eye of the beholder.
If you've come to something recently, you wish the other party to be patient.
As the other party I've been here for over a decade, I thought that was the definition of patience. 
10yrs is what People get for serious crimes, by that standard I've done hard time. 

Look, I'm not gonna go rouge or anything.
I'm gonna be good n wait, but things get kinda sticky out here some times.
So I write about it.
I keep it vague n abstract so all parties on various fronts don't pop a cork but shit I'm goin nuts.

I know in my heart that all this will pass, it always does.
One day I will be on the other side of this struggle n wish it hadn't gotten to me like it has.
That knowledge helps me maintain optimism.
I just wish that day will come soon.

If I could smoke marijuana I'm sure things would be easier.
I'd just get me a Michigan prescription n relive my youth.
2 problems with that though.
It ain't ditch weed nomore brother n I'd probably go nuts.


I know, short trip, BUD!
Oh yeah n Kathy would skin me alive. 
Reality is this.
I enjoy people who view Notes From The Asylum, but I do this for me. 

I can run around in crazy town only so long.
Then I must poke my head out.
She can't do this alone.
Because that's not fare either. 

I will though make crazy pay if it's the last thing I do. 
On that note we end this group therapy session.
Like AA, My name is Pez Outlaw.
Hello @#$ %^&*!?  


After Pez Outlaw, I intend to retire.






Pez Outlaw Diary