Yesterday while out doing chores I started wondering about something.
What if I really am a Catatonic in a mental hospital n all that I perceive as reality is my imagination creating a world to pacify me.
If that were the case, when did my alternate reality actually start?
Was it after a bad acid trip in the late 1960s?
One of the reasons the thought gains any traction in my mind is the charmed life I've led.
On many occasions my life could have been destroyed by the direction of my actions.
Somehow though I seem to always walk right up to the edge without falling off.
The military/Vietnam, Drugs/to much foolish abuse to state, Alcahol/excess.
Life's turns. Always almost losing everything but somehow barely staying afloat.
Why have I been so Lucky, as opposed to others I've watched crash n burn.
Maybe it is just that I have a foolish streak protected by a strong survival instinct.
Still, I've always felt like I had an Angel watching over me that pulls me out before the crash.
Think about it, in your dreams crazy reins supreme but you never see yourself die.
I don't leave my property very often.
Is that because when I go past certain boundaries it threatens my illusions?
This part in a way is probably true, because my world real or imagined is let's call it "creative and self created".
My brain screws with me a lot, yet somehow I've found a degree of peace.
All this said, would I actually mind if this was all a fabrication and not real?
No, I wouldn't.
Do I actually think that I'm catatonic somewhere n this is my minds creation?
No, I mean it's possible but not likely.
On the possible side, I do treat the world like it's not real, especially the internet.
I also feel that we all have the power to write our own story.
That said it can take decades for reality to catch up with the script you wrote.
My touch n go relationship with reality is probably why I believe that there will be a Pez Outlaw Movie.
Why not, it's the way I'd imagine it.
After Pez Outlaw, I intend to retire.
|new profile pic captures my essence|
Pez Outlaw Diary