Wednesday, December 23, 2015

But Wait, There's More. #pezoutlaw #hollywood @pezoutlaw

Have you ever seen the guy on TV who for whatever reason his job has him around women in Bikini's. The guy looks at the camera n says, "I love my Job".
That's me out driving around on my tractor in 6 inches of mud, I love my job. 

I can be outside doing chores getting a bit tired, get on the tractor n start moving poo n my energy returns.
Like I've told you. I used to be a Jeep man, now I'm a tractor man.

Once a week doing chores with Billy Dog n Po an idea will start taking form in my head.
Problem is that there is no freedom until I can get back in here and write it down. Only then can my mind move on.
So we go from yesterday where my brain was fried n I sucked to this. WELCOME!

I know you've heard the phase less is more. Well so have I, actually I've had it said to me in one form or another so often that I thought maybe it was coined for use in my presence.

Kathy is always giving me the nod, hand signals or flat out OK moving on.

That's why when Jeff Maysh said are you ready for what's about to happen it kinda took me by surprise. The idea that folks might go crazy about me n actually want to talk to me or wonder what I think?

You see for a long time now in public I'm that homeless person on the curb with the coffee cup.
People avoid eye contact in a hope that if they don't look at me I won't try to talk to them.
Seriously all I need is the sign "Will Work For Food" and a busy intersection.
I'm that guy. What I'm not is the guy anybody willingly wants to talk to.

So Jeff Maysh, Am I ready for people to be swarming me wanting to talk to me n take my picture.
The real question is Jeff, Are they ready to talk to Me?
Oh by the way "Pictures Are Forbidden". I'm kinda one of those folks that thinks if you take a picture of me, you steal a piece of my soul.
People try taking pictures but my hand goes up like a perp walk.
Some guy who came here wanted to take a picture of me on my tractor. He said, Why not it's just a picture. He got my back and a FIRM NO!

But you know othern that, whatever if you think that's actually what you really want.
It would be different to talk to people who are under the missread that they really want to hear it.
Topsy Tervy World. Cats marrying Dogs, The apocalypse is here.

My large bolt cutters arrived today.
The postal lady n I were laughing at how they'd only be good for robbing small banks. 
Stop it, that was a joke.
My new bolt cutters are for cutting snow chains to the size I need on my tractors rear tires. 

Unwrapped Bolt cutters n they are awesome, just like the ones SWAT Teams use on TV.
They were only $50.00 but saw that they were on Sears for 79.95 regularly $150.00.
Too Cool. 


Pez Outlaw Diary

Cranky Old Bastard ALERT! #pezoutlaw #hollywood @pezoutlaw

What do you think, should old men have "Cranky Old Bastard ALERT!" warning labels?

Dogs n Horses Yes but No Children Allowed.
I don't know why I should have to keep saying this, but apparently I do.

I will not follow anyone on twitter whose page image is a picture of a child.
To me it goes beyond not being in good taste.
I'm a 64 year old man. If the image on your twitter page does not at least look 20, I can not follow you back.

If your homepage image is of a horse or a dog, no problem.
If your home page image is of a child, No.

I also can not follow back any page on facebook or twitter that's in Arabic.
I  have no idea what's being said and I just can not take the chance.

Oh yeah n no porn or excessive cursing. 
Yes I screen each persons page that follows me.

I also shy away from advert pages. Like buy follower pages.
Only real people please.  No Twitter Follower Farms.

Oh yeah there's one other type of page I do not follow back because it's a waste of time.
When I screen your page one of the first things I check is the ratio of follows to followers.
If you follow say 50 people but have 2,000 followers, I will not waste my time with a follow back.
You are just going to remove your follow after the follow back is given.

Other than that though I try to follow back any real people that follow me on twitter or facebook,
After I screen your page.

I will also admit to being confused by the huge number of twenty-something young women that follow me on twitter. 
My home page image:

If you're a twenty-something woman, why on earth would you follow that?

Somebody is cranky this morning?
Is there such a thing as cranky tweeting?

Pez Outlaw Diary

Friday, December 11, 2015

Box Of Puppies #pezoutlaw #hollywood @pezoutlaw

Views from the Asylum are at times not a box of puppies.
Have you ever felt like your sitting in a ditch trying to splice wires back together.
Darkness closing fast, time running out.
You get there but it's a patch job n you know it.
Welcome to the Asylum.

Every month when the moon is full my old friend depression comes to visit for a few days. It may be coincidence but I really don't think so anymore.

I finally started noticing the relationship about a decade ago. It would appear that when the moon is full n at it's strongest, that it just yanks on my brain. Yanks on your brain is a medical term.

So don't expect to find me in the cheering section over the coolness of 2 full moons in one month. The second full moon in one month being the definition of Blue Moon.

The good news, if there is any in depression. When I was younger this monthly depression could last a week. Now one day into it, the day of n one day coming out.

I will take this small gain. BTW, I feel better today.
So to all you suicide jockeys. It gets better, a good day is coming.
But a fan of Full moons or Blue Moons. No.

malaise or maturity

The rate that I'm losing interest in different things is starting to cause me to be concerned.

I seem to be downgrading things that I once thought very important or that excited me.

I also seem to be better at holding down my temper n keeping my mouth shut when annoyed.

I'm not sure if it's malaise or maturity.

My mind also seems to function better. Less people running into the room yelling fire.

Pez Outlaw Diary

Sunday, December 6, 2015

2 Worlds #pezoutlaw #hollywood @pezoutlaw

I walk between two worlds. Pez Outlaws world and the simple life I live here on the farm. 
3 hours, mornings, are spent working here on the computer promoting Pez Outlaw.
The rest of my productive hours, afternoons, are spent feeding watering the horses and general farm work.

Once Pez Outlaw is a success, I plan to leave him behind and turn to the farm full time.
So getting Pez Outlaw strong enough so that he can stand on his own is my goal right now.

To be honest with you all these people that are working on what I'm not allowed to talk about have gone silent. I hear nothing and nobody is contacting me in any fashion anymore.
Though I knew going in that it could be between 1 and 3 years.

You know it's just one of those deals where everybody is your best buddy until you sign all the contracts. Then, well then buddy your on your own again.

Though I'm not sure I care anymore.
The intensity of the fight that was all consuming for over ten years has left me.
I want this to work but I'm not sure I care as much as I did a decade ago.

For 15 years almost in one way or another I have been writing about Pez Outlaw.
Nothing changed within me until I started writing here in Notes From The Asylum.
I have found more peace over the whole Pez thing in 5 months writing in Notes From The Asylum than I did in a decade writing in Pez Outlaw Diary.

I view it as it took the Diary for me to be able to get to the Asylum.
Long story short, I'm in a better place now, thanks to the Asylum.
Instead of being upset about something that happened, I'm daily looking inward and reflecting on things.
Not to mention that Notes From The Asylum is more rewarding.

Well there you go, that's my deal for today.

I always follow back after someone follows me on twitter.
I always friend back on facebook.
except pages I consider not in good taste.

Pez Outlaw Diary 

Friday, December 4, 2015

We're Walking, We're Walking. #pezoutlaw #hollywood @pezoutlaw

You know how people are always asking you, How much crazy you got in that bag?
Considerable Son, Considerable. 
And the thing is I can get it out to play whenever I want.

If 99 people say yes and you are the only one that says no, what is the conclusion?
For me, the 99 are wrong. 
To me this is not defiance, it's a belief to your core in yourself and what you believe.

I believe it possible that one person can see something true in a fog. 
It takes more conviction to stand by a lone belief than to agree in a crowd.
Independent Unique thought is very precious. 

There is a lot of pressure from all directions to conform nowadays. 
Very few are able to withstand that pressure.
Your capitulation is sought to validate group think.

You perceive that a crowd in unanimous agreement is strength.
Truth is there inability to tolerate independent thought shows how weak there position is.
There is safety in group think agreement, that a voice from the wilderness challenges.

True strength is the ability to stand alone and defend or exhibit independent thought.

People say to me.
They'd never make a movie out of my life.
It's to boring.

Well you haven't got your crayons out yet, have you?
It's not your life that's boring, it's how you view that life.

Every since I've taken over writing my life, I'm a happier person.
Of course that means adding a lot of characters that folks enjoy hearing about.
Or is it that they are polite about? Either way I'm happier. 

There is crazy and there is CRAZY.
Truth is there is a very big difference.
My kind of crazy is fun and full of good stories.
I don't even want to give voice to the other kind.

That was the disclaimer.
It's actually sad that I even had to give it.
But you know current events etc, best to say it.

Now I'm depressed. 
We'll be right back after a word from our sponsors.
ALPo, Ed.

Pez Outlaw Diary 

Tuesday, December 1, 2015

Raindrops fallin on my leg. #pezoutlaw #hollywood @pezoutlaw

This time 2 years ago I found myself very anxious about the article Jeff Maysh was writing. 
Though I was not allowed to tell you that I'd sat down for the story that would later appear in The April issue of Playboy.

 Jeff trying to calm me down saying, Hollywood is about to shut down for a couple months. Christmas n New Years.
That not much was going to happen till March or April.

I remember thinking how much that sucked, yet with April came the release of the story.
A year later, here we are again. This time I know without being told that Hollywood shuts down for a couple months.

Maybe in March or April? 
Well that sucks.
You know me, I just love to wait.

So to bide my time I will just keep writing in Notes From The Asylum.
Though today I have been looking at snow chains for my tractor.

In case you missed the joke from the title.
It's the old joke.
Don't piss on my leg n tell me it's raining.
so it follows, being an optimist.
Raindrops keep fallin on my leg. 
A twist on the old song "Raindrops keep falling on my head".

The impatient optimist. "Irony".
Eat your Wheaties so you too can grow up big n strong like Pez Outlaw. 
It could be a thing?

Pez Outlaw Diary